My twenties are wasting away and I'm unhappy, how can I be happier?
April 11, 2014 12:04 PM Subscribe
I'm almost 26, and I don't have the relationship I wanted to have my this age. Being single is starting to feel like a waste of life, and I don't know what to do.
posted by summertimesadness1988 to Human Relations (82 answers total) 35 users marked this as a favorite
I feel so unhappy. I know I’ve posted about this before, but I just can’t shake it off. Therapy, psychics, dance, yoga, daily exercise, self-help reading, meeting new friends, I’ve tried it all. Nothing fills the empty space in my life where a special someone should be. I HATE being single so much, and I don’t know what to do. I can never seem to keep a man around for longer than a few months, and eventually, they end up meeting someone gorgeous that they actually want a long term relationship with.
I hate sleeping alone and I hate waking up alone. My 26th birthday is in two months, and what do you know, another year that I don’t have a boyfriend to celebrate it with. Most people feel depressed over the winter, but my depression increases when the weather gets warmer, because that’s when all the couples are going on their vacations and shore trips, and here I am, living with my parents, being a lonely loser. I don’t want to hang out with my friends, because they all got boyfriends in the past year and a half, and I don’t want to hear about what they’ve been up to and that everyone’s having more sex than I am.
“Learn to happy alone and love will follow.” What a load of bullshit. I do fun, happy stuff all the time, and I don’t see any relationship working out for me. I was asked by a therapist to think back to a time when I was happiest and to recreate that in my life to feel better. Well, that time was two years ago, the last time I had a boyfriend. I’m not happy alone. I can’t be happy alone. I’ve tried it. I’m meant to be with someone, I like being part a couple, and it’s happening for everyone else besides me and it’s really pissing me off. I’m starting to get really bad acne and gaining a lot of weight from the stress and unhappiness. (Even though I exercise almost daily). It also doesn’t help that I graduated with a Master’s in December and my job search (for a higher education administrative job) is going extremely slow, and I also feel a lack of motivation because feel so lonely and depressed. I quit my awful job of two years in Child Care because I couldn’t take it anymore, and living with my parents sucks, as they are unsupportive and negative.
So, I’m back here, on my knees (figuratively), desperately looking for any advice or help with moving through this awful time in my life. I hate being told “You’re still young, enjoy it now,”…No. I wanted young love, I wanted to enjoy being in a couple and having fun without the stress of marriage and kids that comes by in your thirties. And now, my twenties are wasting away and I’m alone, living like a nun, never having sex, and never going on fun dates or experiencing romance. And no amount of words can explain how miserable that makes me.