How to avoid embarrassment in bed?
March 26, 2014 9:03 AM Subscribe
I have a history of sexual performance issues. Part of these stem from the inability to become as erect as I would need to be to perform the function unless I am extremely attracted to the other person. This has led to limited intercourse experience.
posted by JJ987E to Human Relations (29 answers total) 4 users marked this as a favorite
I am seeing a girl tonight who I've been out with a few times and is extremely sweet and caring, but I realize after a failed sexual experience over the weekend that I'm not as attracted to her as I hoped. She has been the primary initiator and has been eager to get into bed with me, which not I'm at all opposed to, but I feel guilty letting her down. I was able to play off my lack of "firmness" Saturday night to alcohol intake, and I thought taking care of her "needs" would help out but she made it crystal clear only penetration would be fully satisfying.
So she wants to try again tonight, and I hope to give it my best shot, but due to my inexperience and other issues I predict the same problems will happen. I don't plan on drinking too much so alcohol doesn't actually become the issue, but it has served as a decent excuse in past situations where I can't perform. Clearly I can't be direct and state "I'm not getting hard because I'm unattracted to you," but how else should I deal with the problem? I want to be honest with her and give it a shot, but I feel bad letting the partner down. Please let me know if you have any advice! Thanks-