I just started my first batch of homebrew cider using Lalvin EC-1118. I had a little yeast left over, and didn't want to throw it away, so I fed it some apple juice and honey. I started wondering about what I could do with it, but a little voice said to me "ah, better think twice about this."
My first thought was to put it in my stomach. I was able to find a page
that indicated eating live yeast would be extremely uncomfortable--abdominal pain, gaseousness, and alcohol poisoning.
Next I started thinking about my persistent athletes foot, which I can never seem to get rid of. What if I gave it some competition? What would happen if I basted my feet with my sticky sugary syrup of living yeast? Would it crowd out and kill the athletes foot yeast? Would the EC-1118 have even worse symptoms than the athletes foot?
Next thought: sometimes my kitchen sink and bathroom drain smell bad and it seems like there is some really gross bacteria living in there in a sort of permanent colony. What would happen if I nourished my yeast colony until I had enough to really fill my entire drain with it? Would it take over the area and get rid of all the weird stuff growing down there?
Perhaps the most insane thought: I have what is basically a permanent open sore caused by inflammation caused by itching caused by inflammation (etc). Part of me wonders if at the end of the chicken/egg cycle of inflammation and itching is some bacterial cause. What would dumping live yeast into an open wound that is constantly seeping plasma do? (PS, yes, I have a medical appointment regarding this issue and no, I'm not actually going to put yeast in my wound. But still. What would happen.)
Does anyone else think about such unusual applications of yeast as me? Have people studied these things, or tried it without studying and lived to record the consequences? Are there any actual household uses for my yeast, besides the usual food purposes (alcohol/dough/etc)?