I don't want to catch up
February 20, 2014 7:02 AM Subscribe
How do I avoid/reject conversation with an old friend I might run in to (without feeling shitty about it)?
posted by anonymous to Human Relations (24 answers total) 5 users marked this as a favorite
Someone who I considered my best friend in middle and high school recently transferred to my university. I don't want to go into the details of our relationship because it is mostly irrelevant, but she treated me very poorly and I never want to be in contact with her again. Our friendship didn't go out with a big fight or anything, I just gradually stopped talking to her as I realized how horribly she treated me (thanks, therapy!). She has made 2 or 3 attempts to contact me in the 3 years since high school ended, which I ignored (and felt very cruel for ignoring her).
Despite the huge size of my campus (which houses 30,000 students), I've already seen her twice. Both times were from behind, so she didn't see me. I'm afraid I will run into her and she will want to talk. I want absolutely nothing to do with her and I want to put that horrible part of my life behind me.
What should I do if I run into her? Ignore her, just say hi and keep walking, stop and talk? I have forgiven her and I understand she has probably grown up and changed, but I still don't want to talk to her. I am not a vengeful person and I really don't want to hurt her feelings (not to preserve her feelings, just because I would be upset with myself for being cruel).
I would love to be the bigger person and exchange pleasantries, but I'm really not in a place where I feel comfortable doing that yet. Do I need to just suck it up and do that? I would really like to hear some opinions and know what you would do if you were in this situation. Thank you!