I'm struggling with choosing between a town I don't like, my marriage and starting a career as after graduating in April 2013. Where should I go from here?
I asked previously
about dealing with getting married and finding work and got some really awesome advice, but I’m struggling with a bunch of things at the moment that I could use some advice for.
I graduated in April 2013 with a BSc in environmental science, and got married to my wonderful hubby in May 2013 (yay!). We both had been struggling to find work out East, and decided that we needed to move somewhere for better work opportunities, with the agreement that whoever got a fulltime job first is where we would go. Fast forward to August, and my hubby finally got a teaching job after looking over 18 months. We then moved 4500km west across the country to a tiny town in BC, and I've been here since October.
For whatever reason, I really don’t like it here. There’s aspects I enjoy like the outdoors, but am struggling to fit in here and am desperately missing my best friends (chosen family), and my Mom to the point where it physically aches. It’s been so hard this year, with graduating and moving and first year of marriage and trying to find a job in my field and feel like my mental health is shot. I’m in therapy right now and have been slowly making progress with my anxiety (I have generalized anxiety disorder).
I’ve been applying for work over the past year, and have been really struggling to find employment in my field. I’ve been lucky enough to have over 16 interviews, but no luck with actually securing a position so far. I’ve been second to the top candidate over half a dozen times, and always get positive feedback on my cover letter, resume, when I’ve asked for some from most interviews. I seem to be either overqualified (for some) or lacking experience in X that made them go with another candidate. I've done 4 years worth of internships, summer jobs, freelancing and work study and am surprised that I'm having such a hard time.
Since October I’ve been trying to find something close by in the environmental field locally or but have found nothing and am realizing that there seems to be little work here for me. After being rejected from yet another job this morning, I’m at my wits end. I HATE my current job cleaning up after disasters (i.e house fire), its mind numbing, physically exhausting, and repetitive. As an example, I spent the week washing 400 countertops after a fire. I know I'm lucky to have a job, but dread going to work.
Its getting to the point where all the job rejections, my current job, and this place are negatively impacting my mental health. I'm trying to stay ontop of things, but am getting so tired of struggling all the time.
I may have an opportunity to move to Calgary for a contract job (~6 months), but am facing down may be facing down a 1) a long distance marriage and/or 2) my partner moving for me to find a job to get going in my careers. Even if the job doesn't work out, I may have to move to find work. My hubby loves his job, and I promised him that we would stay here for two years for him to get the teaching experience he needs. He has said he would move for me and give up his job rather than stay past the end of this school year without me, but I feel like it’s too much to ask from him to give up a contract fulltime job he loves for me to start pursuing my career. The school he’s working for has a $75 000 deficit this year, and while they are not currently thinking about layoffs, his job security is not as great as we originally thought.
Any advice, insight or suggestions would be welcome. I’m at the end of my rope and have no idea where to go from here. Some questions I keep tossing around?
1) How do I choose between my career, our marriage, and his career?
2) How do I keep going in my job search?
3) Should I suck it up and stay here another school year and then move to find work for me?