How to be supportive when you're really worried about the future?
January 15, 2014 8:22 PM Subscribe
My husband is miserable at his job and would like to change. This will likely mean a cut in our income and taking on more debt for him to go to school. How can I be more supportive when I worry about the change in our financial circumstances?
posted by anonymous to Human Relations (48 answers total) 4 users marked this as a favorite
My husband and I are both making good money for the first time in our almost-middle-aged lives. I spent the last 5 years finishing my bachelor's and master's degrees in order to work in what I thought was my dream profession. It turns out to be less of a dream and more a job like other but at least it provides a wage that is solidly middle class. This process has led to us being about 50K in debt thanks to my student loans.
Through all my schooling and the year post-school that I was looking for work my husband has been working for Amtrak in a job that often frustrates him. He's basically working glorified food service but thanks to Amtrak's union he makes a higher hourly wage than my "professional" job and has excellent benefits. He doesn't have a degree and the only two things he's ever wanted to go to school for are creative writing and culinary arts. He's miserable and is beginning to look around at culinary schools in the area but I'm having a hard time being supportive when we have so much debt and are finally comfortable financially.
I know being content at work is very, very important. I've struggled with depression over work in the recent past and it can be terrifying to try to move forward. But we want to have a family and buy a home sometime soon and we're going to have a hard time doing that if he takes a huge pay cut and starts incurring more debt for us. I've always had more of a money brain than he has so I think part of me thinks he's not really thinking about the consequences. But something has to change... how can I be more supportive while making sure we can keep our heads above water financially?