Did you think I was cheating on you?
January 14, 2014 10:22 AM Subscribe
I work in a restaurant a few times a month (I also have a full-time professional job that does not cause me nearly as much angst as this does). Last week, I accidentally left my phone there. During the maybe 45 minutes that the phone was there without me, the owners of the restaurant decided to go through my texts.
posted by ap_classic to Human Relations (41 answers total) 4 users marked this as a favorite
When I went to get it, I obviously caught them off guard, but one of them very aggressively questioned me about some texts that my girlfriend sent me that morning before I arrived to work. Now, my girlfriend also works there once a week on the same day that I do. The texts weren't a big deal, but they were about another employee who doesn't have the best attitude (they weren't inflammatory, more like so and so is talking sh*t again!). The conversation was brief, maybe three texts.
The first several times she asked me what the texts meant, I said that I didn't care to comment on something she needed to break into my phone to read, and that I didn't know what she wanted me to say, that was the whole conversation, she already read it. Then she told me I was lying and there was obviously more to it. I can't imagine what she is even talking about. I stayed calm during this encounter, because I try not to react without having all the facts. When she initially approached me, she had a long rambling story about texts being left open or something. Since getting it back, I know that she read through several text threads. I feel pretty gross and angry about the whole situation, and want to confront them, but I'm not sure how to proceed. For one, I doubt she'll admit that she went through the phone despite it being obvious that she did. And really, that aside, even if one were to "accidentally" see a text from my girlfriend to me, I'm not sure that questioning the content is appropriate.
I've texted a few times to say that I would please like to talk and that I was upset, but am getting sort of a brush off response. What do I with this? How do I stop being angry, and is this even worth having a conversation about? All I really want to know is why they would do something like that to me.
Relevant background info:
-The owners of this establishment have become increasingly paranoid recently, going so far as to install security cameras that also record audio. This is especially weird as it is a tiny place with very few employees, all of whom are completely trustworthy. Obviously, this would have also recorded the joyride through my texts, and I will ask to see it if I need to.
-While we have had a few minor disagreements, up until now, I was considered an excellent employee, and I thought we were friends.
-The reason I still work there is that I truly enjoy it. We have great customers and I love being able to still be part of the service industry while also having a "real job"
-Very few people have ended relationships with them/stopped working there on good terms. The one who questioned me is absolutely always right, and the world is out to get her. This is the only thing I don't like about working there.