How do I bury this? Or shouldn't I?
December 8, 2013 4:05 PM Subscribe
I haven't had a remotely sane romance for 10 years or so and have taken big chunks of time out from it all (sometimes involuntarily) and spent a lot of time reflecting and in therapy. I rekindled an old friendship with a male friend a while back and we have grown quite close. I always found him quite attractive though when we originally worked together he was married and I was dating, so it was a no go.
posted by tanktop to Human Relations (11 answers total) 1 user marked this as a favorite
As we have got to know each other more a calm and sane seeming attraction for him has slowly and naturally swollen. We are now both single and have both been burnt in the past.
He has a slightly asexual feeling, but maybe that's just a disinterest/emotional unavailability vibe..
When we last met up we wound up in a long embrace.. perhaps two or three minutes and as I moved in for a gentle 'kill' he pulled back and said we were like each others therapists. I thought we just had some deep conversations... I said I sometimes felt this pull to him in 'that way' he said he'd 'considered it to, but didn't want to put something as precious as the friendship at risk. I responded respectfully to this.
This is is the first time in a long time I've felt drawn to a guy that's not a tool and I'm sad and confused. If and when he starts dating I don't know how that's going to feel :( but certainly I value his friendship.
Not sure how to handle this and what, if anything, any of that means? Bottom line is he's not available.. right?