Resources on healthy relationships
October 22, 2013 7:39 AM Subscribe
I want to give my niece some resources on what healthy relationships look like. Help me find them.
posted by not that girl to human relations (19 answers total) 19 users marked this as a favorite
My parents were crappy at raising kids, and my brother seems to have followed in their footsteps. In part because she was estranged from my brother, my 20-year-old niece lived with me and my partner for about six months earlier this year.
During that time we became concerned about how her boyfriend handled anger and frustration, and the way he talked to her sometimes. Now she lives with him, and yesterday she told me that she had deleted her Facebook account because he had looked through it and decided she was cheating on him, based on some conversations she'd had with a high school friend. She decided to resolve this conflict by just not being on Facebook anymore. She doesn't seem to have any idea how screwed up this is. I'm not surprised; at her age, I didn't have any idea how screwed up certain things were either. I'd like to help her figure it out before she gets too badly hurt.
The thing is, in my experience most people don't respond very well to "we're worried that your boyfriend is at best a jerk and at worst abusive, here's a checklist for figuring out if you're in an abusive relationship." What I'd like to do is write her a letter wishing her and her boyfriend well, and talking about my own challenges as a young adult figuring out how to have healthy relationships, given the mess that is our family. In the letter, I'd like to point her to a couple of resources about what healthy relationships look like. Best if they're on-line, I think, and relatively short. Ideas?
I'd welcome book recommendations as well.
(I also plan to remind her that she's always welcome at our place, and include a couple hundred bucks cash for emergencies. She has no parental support right now.)