Why won't you do any washing up?!
October 16, 2013 6:54 AM Subscribe
How do we ask our housemate to do more around the house without sounding like a douchenozzle?
posted by Trexsock to human relations (35 answers total) 2 users marked this as a favorite
I've known our housemate for about 7 years now. He's always been a bit scatterbrained; living with his mum, losing things at an alarming rate etc. We decided it would be good for both of us to get a house together for financial reasons (the rent is disgustingly cheap), and the addition of my fiancee in the house makes it even cheaper. For context, I am 26, my fiancee is 24 and the housemate is 24 also; whether that makes any difference is up to you guys!
We have a problem, though. He's ridiculously messy (me and my fiancee can't really say much because we're not the cleanest people ever, but at least we keep it to our own room and clean up after ourselves regularly):
- He leaves his washing up (ie: plates, cups etc.) for at least two weeks if not longer. We have a really small kitchen that has trouble fitting two people in at once, so obviously our worktop space is v. limited. His washing up takes up all of the available space, so we have to physically move things and do some of his washing up in order to have room to even prepare our food.
- He leaves his washing (clothes) in the washing machine for five days running, and only takes it out when prompted about three times because we need to use the washing machine. He then leaves his dry washing on the only clothes horse we own for an equal amount of time, again only moving it when asked to.
- He constantly brings round friends without even a mention to us. This often means us going downstairs to make a cuppa and finding about six random guys hanging out in the living room. It's also been the case a few times that we've gone down quite late at night and almost tripped over an unexpected sleeping man, leading him to almost get a faceful of boiling hot coffee. (They are quite good at keeping the noise down when asked, but it gets a little tiresome and sometimes it doesn't even feel like it's our own home.)
- He also has to be reminded every time it's his turn to buy things for the house (ie: toilet roll and other shared goods), and he has recently used up all of our shampoo (a Lush bar which would normally last months and months, and is now gone. After mentioning this to him, he said "oh yeah, I used it once. Sorry, I'll get myself a new one when I go shopping." and then proceeded to use it again anyway.) This is irritating for me and my fiancee as we're both unemployed and have very limited money.
We've tried to talk to him about these issues and he always seems to agree. He's a pleasant sort of guy and generally has no problems with this sort of thing, but he never actually follows up and does what we ask. Our lease is 6 months, and will be up in a few months time, but there's not really any chance we can afford to move and get our own place because the costs are too prohibitive. It's kind of starting to feel like I'm his parent and having to tell him to do chores all the time.