Please help with ideas for a straight 30-year-old guy to find NSA sex that isn't actually sex.
I was a sexual late bloomer and still have little experience, and have been looking to change that by finding some casual sex through craigslist. Thing is, unlike most people posting NSA ads, I don't actually want full sex. The thought of full sex with a woman I barely know makes me uncomfortable, but not so the thought of just having some teenage-style make-out sessions first. (This was actually inspired by an AskMeFi thread, which I can no longer find, where an OP with similarly little experience was advised to start with encounters where it's agreed beforehand that "the pants stay on".) I've posted some craigslist ads looking for "makeout buddies" (though leaving out the "little experience" part), but have gotten no responses so far. Two questions: (a) What should and shouldn't I put in the ad to maximize my chances of a response? (b) What are some other ways I can achieve this? Something like The Stranger's Lovelab
might be worth trying, but most of the users there are in Seattle and I'm not (I'm in SF Bay).
To preempt two answers I foresee: "Get a girlfriend" -- I'm already doing the conventional dating thing via OKCupid, so I am working on that, but what I'm looking for here is specifically NSA and zero-commitment. I don't want to state the above on my OKCupid profile because there are people I know on OKC, and same goes for other dating sites: without a picture you get zero visitors, but if I post my picture with the above information I might get recognized by colleagues etc. Also lots of women on OKC filter out men who are looking for "casual sex". "Pick up a woman in a bar" -- I'm awkward and shy so have never done this, and also I want it to be understood explicitly in advance that full sex isn't on, which wouldn't likely be the case in such a scenario. "Use professional help" -- I would, but can't afford it.
Thanks in advance for any creative ideas.