Comments on: Dead grasshopper

Question: Dead grasshopper

Homeskillet Freshy Fresh — Tue, 27 Sep 2005 10:22:21 -0800

My fingers are stuck in a chinese finger trap at the office, and my coworkers refuse to help.

Googling 'chinese finger trap solution' isn't working. FIX ME

By: goodnewsfortheinsane

goodnewsfortheinsane — Tue, 27 Sep 2005 10:23:51 -0800

Don't pull - push?

By: jrossi4r

jrossi4r — Tue, 27 Sep 2005 10:24:22 -0800

Stop pulling. Press the tips of your fingers together then remove one finger at a time.

By: WCityMike

WCityMike — Tue, 27 Sep 2005 10:24:38 -0800

Push and turn, if just pushing doesn't work.

By: Plutor

Plutor — Tue, 27 Sep 2005 10:24:56 -0800

How the hell did you type this? I smell hoax.

Grasp each end with your thumb and middle fingers, and push inwards. The ends will expand. Then, you can carefully pull your index fingers out.

By: WCityMike

WCityMike — Tue, 27 Sep 2005 10:25:32 -0800

Obligatory Wikipedia link. But, yeah, I smell hoax, too.

By: weapons-grade pandemonium

weapons-grade pandemonium — Tue, 27 Sep 2005 10:26:28 -0800

Is that you, W?
Try Google Images.

By: Homeskillet Freshy Fresh

Homeskillet Freshy Fresh — Tue, 27 Sep 2005 10:27:33 -0800

I might not be bright, but Im also not bright enough to lie.

By: Homeskillet Freshy Fresh

Homeskillet Freshy Fresh — Tue, 27 Sep 2005 10:29:22 -0800

YEAH!!!!! Thank you guys so much.

By: bryak

bryak — Tue, 27 Sep 2005 10:38:54 -0800

wow... you were serious.

i was going suggest just pulling your fingers apart until it broke. the traps aren't exactly made of carbon fiber and they cost all of a nickel.

By: Homeskillet Freshy Fresh

Homeskillet Freshy Fresh — Tue, 27 Sep 2005 10:49:19 -0800

Actually, I tried picking up a pair of scissors, but I couldn't get it swung around right.

By: klangklangston

klangklangston — Tue, 27 Sep 2005 11:21:36 -0800

How'd you type this?

By: Homeskillet Freshy Fresh

Homeskillet Freshy Fresh — Tue, 27 Sep 2005 11:26:16 -0800

Slowly. And frustratingly.

By: Specklet

Specklet — Tue, 27 Sep 2005 11:35:02 -0800

Wow, I thought everyone learned how to get out of those in the second grade. But then, I'm a person who got the joke "What's black and white and red all over?" about five years ago.

By: Homeskillet Freshy Fresh

Homeskillet Freshy Fresh — Tue, 27 Sep 2005 11:40:50 -0800

I've seen these everywhere. I vaguely knew there was a "trick" involved, and that certainly I could figure it out.

MAN, FOILED BY HIS OWN HUBRIS.

By: Homeskillet Freshy Fresh

Homeskillet Freshy Fresh — Tue, 27 Sep 2005 13:07:50 -0800

It's hard to mentally shut out the finger trap when it succeeds. It's a sucking feeling on your fingers that somehow broadcasts failure and diminished mental facilities to everyone around you.

The office and my father have now seen this thread, so while the finger trap is hushed, I have a new beacon of DUHHHH

By: odinsdream

odinsdream — Tue, 27 Sep 2005 14:16:32 -0800

I didn't know that any chinese finger traps existed that actually worked. All the ones I've ever used have been cheap pieces of crap that wouldn't even hold your fingers in, really.

By: fishfucker

fishfucker — Tue, 27 Sep 2005 14:27:28 -0800

i used to be deathly afraid of chinese finger traps when i was a kid and stayed well clear when they poured forth from schoolyard pinata. I always imagined myself getting stuck indefinitely, doomed to having a red, purple and green weave forever fastened around my index fingers.

then i moved on to more rational fears, like women.

By: ?!

?! — Tue, 27 Sep 2005 14:47:11 -0800

ff: they operate on the same principle as the finger traps. Push, don't pull.

By: wolftrouble

wolftrouble — Tue, 27 Sep 2005 15:48:47 -0800

I hereby bestow upon this thread the "BEST QUESTION AND ANSWERS EVER" award.

By: Cranberry

Cranberry — Tue, 27 Sep 2005 15:53:12 -0800

and the world is a better place

By: cathodeheart

cathodeheart — Tue, 27 Sep 2005 16:38:47 -0800

wow. i thought this thread was going to be about a metaphorical finger trap.

By: weapons-grade pandemonium

weapons-grade pandemonium — Tue, 27 Sep 2005 16:39:41 -0800

I heard that somewhere in Asia they catch monkeys by hollowing out a coconut, leaving a hole (just big enough for a monkey to get his hand inside), baiting it with seeds or nuts, and chaining it to a tree. The monkey reaches in for the seeds, but can't withdraw a closed fist. The locals can then walk up and catch the monkey, who will not let go of the seeds to open his fist. Now if you had an infinite number of monkeys, eventually one would AskMefi.

By: darkmatter

darkmatter — Tue, 27 Sep 2005 16:39:42 -0800

then i moved on to more rational fears, like women.
posted by fishfucker at 2:27 PM PST on September 27 [!]

Ah, that's where your name came from.

By: HuronBob

HuronBob — Tue, 27 Sep 2005 16:42:01 -0800

do you wanna know what NOT to put in there?

By: kimota

kimota — Tue, 27 Sep 2005 16:57:48 -0800

dead grasshopper?

By: bachelor#3

bachelor#3 — Tue, 27 Sep 2005 17:36:45 -0800

So are you telling me I have to let go of these delicious seeds to get my hand out of this coconut?

By: tellurian

tellurian — Tue, 27 Sep 2005 17:44:29 -0800

Googling works if you remove the quotes (10th down).

By: xyzzy

xyzzy — Wed, 28 Sep 2005 01:27:16 -0800

Don't worry. Even Data got confused.

By: Homeskillet Freshy Fresh

Homeskillet Freshy Fresh — Thu, 29 Sep 2005 11:33:26 -0800

Nice use of the idiot tag!

By: kirkaracha

kirkaracha — Fri, 14 Oct 2005 14:32:04 -0800

I heard that somewhere in Asia they catch monkeys by hollowing out a coconut, leaving a hole (just big enough for a monkey to get his hand inside), baiting it with seeds or nuts, and chaining it to a tree. The monkey reaches in for the seeds, but can't withdraw a closed fist.

There's something similar with raccoons in Where the Red Fern Grows.