Are you Ready to Corporate Rock!
July 3, 2013 8:05 AM

I have to submit my favorite "high energy, rock song" for a corporate retreat. Somehow I don't think my standard music choices will suffice.

So I am going to a corporate retreat and was told to submit to submit my favorite high energy rock song, however I don't think my actual favorites -

Kill Your Television
N.W.O

are going to cut it.

I work for a fairly conservative company. This will be a fairly small retreat (my lack of participation will be noticed if I don't submit something), but I don't want to submit a standard AC/DC song, since I would like a smidgeon of my taste in music represented.

As a side note - this will be my first time meeting a vast majority of the company.

Yes, I know the inherent irony of asking the internet to give me individualism - but, I need help in coming up with a song to submit.

So MeFites - here are the rules for songs:

1.) Must be fast paced/high energy
2.) Must be some version of 'rock'
3.) Must be able to be played in front of your grandmother without embarrassment (no cursing/no overt sex or drug references)
4.) Preferred a little counter culture (was debating submitting Lust for Life but vetoed it based on the lyrics.

I was thinking of submitting - I'm Shipping up to Boston but could use some help getting the ideas flowing. Thanks!
posted by Suffocating Kitty to Work & Money (62 answers total) 9 users marked this as a favorite
How "no cursing" do you have to be? Because "Hair of the Dog" by Nazareth is pretty awesome.

if not:
- Stranglehold by Ted Nugent
- I Love Myself Today by Biff Naked (I'll bet that most people will be bringing songs sung by men. Be different!)
- Pressure Zone by Beat Union (look at the lyrics. It is perfect.)
posted by PuppetMcSockerson at 8:09 AM on July 3, 2013


Wolf Parade This Heart's On Fire.

I think I've recommended it before but I just really like that song. Also I feel really bad for you and I hope you survive your retreat because yechh
posted by Think_Long at 8:10 AM on July 3, 2013


One of the founders of Groupon has you covered with this just-released album of original 80s-style motivational rock.
posted by mikepop at 8:11 AM on July 3, 2013


Everyone's favourite motivational speaker and cultural ambassador: Andrew WK, Party Hard.
posted by hydatius at 8:13 AM on July 3, 2013


The Final Countdown as a tip o' the hat to Arrested Development?
posted by nightwood at 8:14 AM on July 3, 2013


Elastica's "Stutter" too much?
posted by robocop is bleeding at 8:15 AM on July 3, 2013


I would be tempted to give them The Final Countdown or You're the Best Around because I watch too much TV.
posted by phunniemee at 8:15 AM on July 3, 2013


"Cult of Personality" by Living Colour. If you have to go to such a lifeless, sponsored-by-Enzyte-and-catered-by-Aramark event, you might as well make it truely cringeworthy.
posted by Inspector.Gadget at 8:17 AM on July 3, 2013


I would go with Jonathan Richman and the Modern Lovers' "Roadrunner," for its combination of

a) indie pedigree;
b) actual radio airplay and familiarity, if anyone in the company has ever lived in New England;
c) being one of the purest expressions of pure joy and energy in the history of recorded music
posted by escabeche at 8:19 AM on July 3, 2013


"Pride (In the Name of Love)" by U2?
posted by scody at 8:19 AM on July 3, 2013


oh, and I don't think there's any cursing (at least not in English!) in "Should I Stay or Should Go" by the Clash.
posted by scody at 8:22 AM on July 3, 2013


Kim Mitchell. Go for a soda. Very good energy.

Maybe something by Triumph? They're super high-energy and the lyrics tend to be all positive and stuff.

Maybe 'born to be wild'? It's about drugs but it doesn't sound like it is. Or 'bad to the bone'. Classic, rock, yet so ubiquitous as to be totally inoffensive.
posted by windykites at 8:28 AM on July 3, 2013


This is ridiculous. Go all-in on the ridiculous. With that in mind, I suggest the following:

Eye of the Tiger.
Highway to the Danger Zone.
posted by adamrice at 8:29 AM on July 3, 2013


Oh yeah, there's always "eye of the tiger".
posted by windykites at 8:29 AM on July 3, 2013


Not sure if it's 'counter culture', but it has no lyrics to get you in trouble: Loops of Fury
posted by nightwood at 8:29 AM on July 3, 2013


Well, you can always do the completely expected:

Rock You Like a Hurricane by The Scorpions or Highway to the Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins

Change it up a bit with Radar Love or Twilight Zone. Both by Golden Earring.

I guarantee you about 30 people are going to suggest U2s Beautiful Day.

Boom Boom Pow by the Black Eyed Peas.

One Step Beyond by Madness.

The Impression that I Get by the Mighty, Mighty Bosstones
posted by Ruthless Bunny at 8:31 AM on July 3, 2013


I know it's already been suggested, but I'm pretty sure this was the moment that "Cult of Personality" was written for.
posted by MCMikeNamara at 8:31 AM on July 3, 2013


Some things are so mainstream they become counter-culture. Following up on adamrice's suggestions, I suggest:

John Fogerty, Centerfield
Neil Diamond, Coming to America

Somewhat subversive:

Spinal Tap, Tonight I'm Gonna Rock You (Tonight)
posted by deanc at 8:33 AM on July 3, 2013


Stryrofoam - Fugazi
posted by trbrts at 8:35 AM on July 3, 2013


Sleigh Bells -- "Infinity Guitars"
Sleigh Bells -- "Crown on the Ground"
posted by Rock Steady at 8:37 AM on July 3, 2013


I'd go straight for Starship: "We Built This City." It doesn't get any more corporate rock than that.
posted by Faint of Butt at 8:38 AM on July 3, 2013


How about "New Noise" by the Refused?
posted by Philemon at 8:38 AM on July 3, 2013


Party in the USA, Miley Cyrus.
posted by telegraph at 8:42 AM on July 3, 2013


You could probably sneak the Pixies classic Gigantic past everyone without them cluing in to the subject matter.
posted by Homeboy Trouble at 8:42 AM on July 3, 2013


I'm pretty sure the only correct answer is Tina Turner's 'Simply the Best'. C'mon, now.
posted by Salamander at 8:44 AM on July 3, 2013


Oh hey, how about Shoorah Shoorah? The Betty Wright version or the Selector version? It might pass as nineties-style corporate transgression, but, like Roadrunner, it's too awesome to be coopted.

Although really, I'd just go with Roadrunner. It's one of those rare things that is popular and good and truthful without being transgressive, like a song from an alternate world.
posted by Frowner at 8:46 AM on July 3, 2013


Bruce Springsteen 'Born to Run'?
posted by Asparagus at 8:47 AM on July 3, 2013


So, in this situation, the lyrics to Tom Petty's American Girl are somewhat subversive.

Or you could go with REM - It's the End of the World as We Know It.
posted by MexicanYenta at 8:48 AM on July 3, 2013


This one was killing me:

Hey Ya by Outkast.

Really, isn't that the best one?
posted by Ruthless Bunny at 8:50 AM on July 3, 2013


Re: Your Brains by Jonathan Coulton
Full Lyrics
Heya Tom, it's Bob from the office down the hall
It's good to see you buddy, how've you been?
Things have been OK for me except that I'm a zombie now
I really wish you'd let us in
I think I speak for all of us when I say I understand
Why you folks might hesitate to submit to our demand
But here's an FYI: you're all gonna die screaming

All we want to do is eat your brains
We're not unreasonable, I mean, no one's gonna eat your eyes
All we want to do is eat your brains
We're at an impasse here, maybe we should compromise:
If you open up the doors
We'll all come inside and eat your brains
posted by Sophont at 8:51 AM on July 3, 2013


I was also thinking Tom Petty, but Running Down a Dream. (Your dream, of course, is to climb the corporate ladder!) Not that counter-culture, but great song.
posted by chickenmagazine at 8:52 AM on July 3, 2013


Train in Vain - The Clash
posted by 5_13_23_42_69_666 at 8:53 AM on July 3, 2013


Oh, no, wait, dude, you need to use Talking Heads' Born Under Punches - "well I'm a tumbler, born under punches...no thanks, I'm a government man!!!"

I mean, you could just use Burning Down The House. Talking Heads were always sort of preppy-conservative, actually.
posted by Frowner at 8:54 AM on July 3, 2013


You realize of course this is your chance to spike the punch bowl with LSD, climb up on stage once the mass hallucinations start, wearing mirror shades, smoking a Dunhill in a cigarette holder a la Hunter S. Thompson, with your necktie around your head Rambo-style, and do your best back-to-the-audience, fist-in-air, Springsteen-Born-in-the-USA pose as Dead Kennedys' "Soup Is Good Food" plays too loudly over the crappy PA and you growl into the microphone, "Happy retreat, you sick bastards!"?
posted by Celsius1414 at 8:55 AM on July 3, 2013


Is Queen's We Will Rock You too obvious?
posted by looli at 8:57 AM on July 3, 2013


Playing non-offensive, yet energizing music is part of my job. I try to look at the demographic—most events are American men 40-55ish so you can't go wrong with stuff that was popular when they were teenagers if you're trying to actually suggest something they'll like.

If it were me and I was just responsible for 2 suggestions I would put in something that's has no swear words but may not be the main demo's taste. I figure they won't play it if they don't like it. My stuff's probably too pop-y or happy compared to your tastes, but I've found that a lot of guitars really don't play well super loud over loudspeakers to corporate audiences who aren't familiar with the song. Here's some stuff I play that's a compromise for me:

The Cars: Let's Go, Shake it Up
Vampire Weekend: A-Punk
OK Go: Here It Goes Again
The Shins: Australia
Martin Solveig & Dragonette: Hello
Fun: We Are Young
Stronger: Kanye West (corporate dudes love this song even though it doesn't have clean lyrics)
The Killers: Mr Brightside
Black Eyed Peas: I Gotta Feeling
Phoenix: Lisztomania
Fatboy Slim: Right Here Right Now
The Who: The Seeker
Depeche Mode: Just Can't Get Enough


And at the end of the event if they aren't leaving I might get brave with:
The Ting Tings: Keep Your Head
Supergrass: Time to Go
posted by Bunglegirl at 9:01 AM on July 3, 2013


I love the Roadrunner suggestion, but it will mean nothing if you're in Tulsa.

If you want the stodgy old-timers to recognize you listen to that "edgy alternative-type" music, you could offer a better-known song by any one of the following:
The Alarm, The Cars, Cheap Trick, The Clash, The Fixx, Billy Idol, INXS, Midnight Oil, The Police, Pretenders, REM, or the Smithereens.

Perhaps Birth, School, Work, Death by the Godfathers, if you think they can handle it.
posted by otters walk among us at 9:05 AM on July 3, 2013


As soon as I read "conservative company" I thought of CCR's Fortunate Son, but I am kind of a jackass.
posted by elizardbits at 9:19 AM on July 3, 2013


HEY GUYS STOP STOP STOP

The only answer to this question is, almost any single by the Foo Fighters released between 1999 and 2007.

Just, take your pick. It's wall-to-wall what you're looking for.

+1 point to everyone who recommends Andrew WK.
posted by Poppa Bear at 9:27 AM on July 3, 2013


You can always sell your soul and go with Takin' Care of Business by BTO.
I understand Homer Simpson is partial to the "workin' overtime" part.
posted by gohabsgo at 9:34 AM on July 3, 2013


Koka Kola by The Clash, if you want to be real snarky:

Elevator! Going up!
In the gleaming corridors of the 51st floor
The money can be made if you really want some more
Executive decision-a clinical precision
Jumping from the windows-filled with indecision

I get good advice from the advertising world
Treat me nice says the party girl...


Going the Distance by Cake

Don't Stop Believing, by Journey.

On second thought, just do what Celsius1414 suggests because that is perfect.
posted by inertia at 9:34 AM on July 3, 2013


I nearly choked on my pretzel over "Happy retreat, you sick bastards!" But it was worth it.

I know ALL TOO WELL the complicated emotion that is "not wanting to get fired, but also wanting to express yourself, but ALSO wanting to point out the inherent ludicrousness of the prevailing paradigm" (I was the only person at the law firm with fire engine red hair for a number of years). Some ideas off the top of my head, of varying degrees of sneer:

Electric Six - Dance Commander (few things rock harder, and it's astonishingly kinda clean)
Harvey Danger - Flagpole Sitta (the slightly-more-subversive version of a Foo Fighters song)
Dinosaur Jr - Almost Ready (noisy, crunchy yet nonetheless rockin')
Sugar - Gee Angel (per Wee Thumbscrew, "THIS SONG ROCKS MY FACE OFF!")
The Buzzcocks - Isolation (because the theme will hold VERY TRUE at this retreat!)
Clear Light - Mr. Blue (uh, probably not unless you DO want to get fired)
Primus - Making Plans For Nigel (ditto)
Japandroids - The House That Heaven Built
Drgn King - Wild Night
posted by julthumbscrew at 9:43 AM on July 3, 2013


I would go with "You Got The Touch." Transformers version, not Dirk Diggler's.
posted by queensissy at 10:16 AM on July 3, 2013


I vote for Sleater-Kinney - Entertain. It starts a little slow but ramps nicely. Lyrics are pretty clean but the counter-cultural (circa George W.'s second term) element is there.

Meanwhile, what is this song going to be used for? Is it going to be part of a larger playlist? Or (as I suspect) is it going to be playing like a batter's walk-up music for your introduction?
posted by mhum at 10:20 AM on July 3, 2013


Oh wait. "Entertain" has a "fuck" in there as well as a "whore". Maybe not clean enough.
posted by mhum at 10:25 AM on July 3, 2013


What about something by Muse? They're pretty high-energy. My go-to would be Map of the Problematique. I think the lyrics are clean, but the linked video shows the lyrics so you can check if you want.
posted by number9dream at 10:28 AM on July 3, 2013


Oh please choose "Pictures of Matchstick Men"
posted by RobotVoodooPower at 10:30 AM on July 3, 2013


Hüsker Dü, New Day Rising

Energetic! High energy! Clean lyrics! Less than three minutes long! Vaguely threatening sense of oppressiveness wrapped in a soaring anthem! Unobjectionable yet disquieting! Screamy enough to get people's attention, melodic enough to hold it! Will cause a certain subset of 40-50 year old executives and middle managers to get nostalgically misty about that girl with purple hair that they dated their sophomore year of college!
posted by BitterOldPunk at 10:36 AM on July 3, 2013


Atlas by Battles. The lyrics are indecipherable, but not obscene.
posted by It's Never Lurgi at 10:39 AM on July 3, 2013


I'm going to go off on a tangent a bit and suggest Pizzicato Five's Twiggy Twiggy. translated lyrics
posted by davejay at 10:43 AM on July 3, 2013


How about Angry Again by Megadeth? Megadeth being super corporate (it's on Last Action Hero!) could work?
posted by skittlekicks at 10:54 AM on July 3, 2013


Definitely the Clash. Specifically Pressure Drop.
posted by Potomac Avenue at 11:45 AM on July 3, 2013


Badlands by Bruce Springsteen
posted by jgirl at 11:58 AM on July 3, 2013


How about Ramones - I Don't Wanna Grow Up?
posted by mhum at 12:00 PM on July 3, 2013


Best of You - Foo Fighters
Cannonball - Breeders
Crash - The Primitives
Route 66 - Depeche Mode
Mistaken - Save Ferris
I'm Gonna Be (500 Miles) - The Proclaimers
Radio Gaga - Queen
Under Pressure - Queen & Bowie

and my personal favorite for this:

Sell Out - Reel Big Fish
posted by ApathyGirl at 12:05 PM on July 3, 2013




Maybe some Sloan? "She Says What She Means" is nice & peppy (the album version doesn't have the "narration"), as is "If It Feels Good Do It"

I also like the Wolf Parade suggestion above, though for my money I would suggest "The Grey Estates".
posted by Johnny Assay at 2:17 PM on July 3, 2013


Just for the music/beat/energy - Love Kills by Freddie Mercury. The lyrics aren't relevant to corporate, but they're not offensive in any way either. Or the instrumental version.
posted by still_wears_a_hat at 2:36 PM on July 3, 2013


Twisted Sister - We're Not Gonna Take It, if you don't think that's a little too blunt.
posted by tau_ceti at 3:52 PM on July 3, 2013


Blur - Song 2 Woo Hoo!
posted by obscure simpsons reference at 3:54 PM on July 3, 2013


You really can't go wrong with Los Lobos' Mas y Mas.
posted by nenequesadilla at 5:12 PM on July 3, 2013


As a follow up - the first two songs walking into the Conference is "boom boom pow" by the black eyed peas and "rock you like a hurricane" - thanks to everyone who gave suggestions!
posted by Suffocating Kitty at 7:46 AM on July 9, 2013


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