How to power through apathy? Or why even bother?
June 12, 2013 11:07 AM Subscribe
I have come down with a case of bad apathy. How do I find the energy/motivation/desire to even start to want to come out of it?
posted by kanata to human relations (13 answers total) 27 users marked this as a favorite
I just can't seem to care about anything anymore. I would have to work up the energy to even rise to the level of basic caring. I know that I should want to care but I just can't. How do I get out of this? Or how can I get the basic desire to want to get out of it?
I've had life long depression. I've done all the meds (Yes, all the meds.) and last week started (with my doctor) to come off the ones I am on because they just aren't working. The only other real solutions I am being offered are surgery (I have no idea what kind) and ECT. I am used to my depression. This is something different.
I just don't care. I have a new relationship. I have a dog. I am going to therapy. I am doing all the things I need to do (see my question history for more details of my saga of depression). Yet I just don't care.
I know I should care. I know I should be excited about having found a kind and supportive girlfriend. I know that I should be thrilled that I have this fabulous dog in my life. I know that I am better off when I was constantly suicidal. I know all the changes I have made. I've come far. But still I just do not care about anything.
I am faking it until things change but I just can't even find any ounce of pleasure in anything and I don't know how about to find a way to get my spark back. This apathy started before I came off my meds so it isn't that.
How do you make yourself find joy in life again? Or, not even joy, just an ounce of pleasure. I am at the point now where you could boil my dog's head in front of me and I'd just go "meh".
How do I get out of this? How do I find a way to get out of this?
Note: I am not suicidal at all. I am just existing.