I acted needy- can I do anything to rectify this?
March 11, 2013 2:40 AM Subscribe
Been dating a guy for 4 months and I acted needy, is there anyway I can resolve this. I don't want to lose him but fear it may be a little late now!
posted by artystar to Human Relations (38 answers total) 8 users marked this as a favorite
I have been dating this guy for four months and thinks have been going relatively well, we still haven’t had the bf/gf conversation but I was happy. On my birthday he made a real effort, took me to a lovely restaurant and bought me lovely gifts. We were seeing each other regularly.
The following weekend it was my birthday drinks with my friends and he was meant to be coming. Instead, however, he ended up getting drunk with his football friends I had to chase to see what was going on and he kept on delaying turning up. In the end I told him not to bother and stayed with my friends. The next day we met up to talk about what had happened, he apologised profusely and said it had all got a bit drunk , I told him exactly how it made me feel and dealt with it.
Anyway, following this he has been busy at work and not particularly there, saying he was busy so couldn’t meet up. So I text him and said ‘Is everything ok, you have seemed distant this week and I know you are busy but if you it’s because you are not interested please let me know- I would rather know the truth.’ (I know NEEDY) I’m just fed-up of games from the past and thought I’d give him the opportunity and let him walk away. But he said no that wasn’t the case and he had been useless and busy and that he wanted to meet up- so he cooked me dinner that evening and it was fine.
This week he was texting me fine etc, then it came to Friday and asked if he wanted to meet up and he said he didn’t know what was going on had a busy weekend and needed to sort stuff out. Later that evening he text saying he needed an evening to himself. So I decided to play it ‘cool’ and said that’s fine have a good weekend, I’m off out for work drinks- hope you feel less stressed and I’ll talk to you soon. I also said I am here if you need any help sorting stuff.
Instead I got drunk with work colleagues. When he then text me ‘saying depending on plans, I’ll try and see you this weekend what are your plans?’ I read it badly and flipped – I ended up saying ‘I think you should do your thing this weekend and I’ll do mine, I am fed-up of being an option, I see you when I want to see you not because I have nothing else to do- when you are ready to see me let me know!’
I never got a response, the next day I rang and left an answer phone message apologising saying I had read his message out of context. He text me later completely ignoring that but, asking me how I was and if I had recovered. We had a bit of a light conversation- which ended with him not replying to my last text and I haven’t heard from him in the last couple of days….
So I know I have dealt with this badly and completely wrong, acting so needy- think I was feeling bit rubbish about how things were going and it came out in one drunken mess. Any advice out there? Shall I wait for him to contact me now? Is it too late- what should I do?
I'm thinking I should wait for him to get in touch and see what he says. If he doesn't then I guess I know my answer :( Wish I was better at this stuff.