I'm 24, and I live in the suburbs a half-hour north of Boston. I'm about to get health insurance that includes mental care. I don't know how the private healthcare system works. How should I get a mental-health diagnosis? What doctors and therapists in the area could help me with whatever problems I may have? Details inside.
If there are previous AskMes on these questions, please link me to them. I realize a lot of people post similar things here.
I'm unfamiliar with private healthcare because I was covered under my father's military plan. After I aged out of that, I didn't get insurance. It was too expensive. I spent a year temping, and then I got hired permanently at the place I was working, which is how I now have insurance.
I don't know whether I have depression, social anxiety, attention-deficit disorder, or any other mental issue. I know that I often have hours-long periods of self-hatred. I know that I'm insecure: The other day, I attended an improv-comedy show in which some troupemates from college performed, but I didn't talk to them afterward, because I felt unworthy of their company. Sometimes I spend hours on the internet, going from site to site, learning nothing and feeling agitated for no identifiable reason. I've always procrastinated and I've always been lazy. I don't have any ambitions driving me onward.
The insecurity is to some degree justified: I pay rent, but I live with my parents; I have no close friends; I have no romantic or sexual history; my job doesn't offer much opportunity to learn new skills or rise in the corporate structure; I haven't cultivated any talents; I'm not even academically accomplished. A lot of teachers cut me a lot of slack over the years. I graduated from college in September, not in May.
I'm this guy
. I even work in payroll.
Obviously, I'm glad that I have a job at all, and that I have enough extra money to drive to town to see comedy shows, even after paying more toward my student loans than I need to. Obviously, many of my problems are of my own making.
Still, I often feel so bad about my situation that I can't move myself to do better. I'm using Health Month to keep myself on an exercise regime, and I'm doing well, but that's about it.
Money is an object, but I don't think it's so bad that I couldn't scrimp here, scrimp there, and get mental care that way.
Thanks for reading this far.