Is a facebook message a bad move for contacting the elusive lady?
February 1, 2013 1:39 PM Subscribe
I don't want to breech the fb borders yet, as I feel it could kill some of the mystery and magic of getting to know her in real life, but we may never cross paths again. Do I exercise my limited patience for a moment that I can't wait for or just send a msg and start the ball rolling?
posted by talljamal to human relations (26 answers total) 1 user marked this as a favorite
So I'm in one MA program, she's in another. We crossed paths in the workshop a couple days in a row last week and I nonchalantly interacted with her. I think we caught eyes a few times, under a short space of time. I was instantly attracted.
At the cafe in my campus, she was sitting with a friend, I sat next to them, but didn't acknowledge her, just asked across the table to the friend if the seat was available. There wasn't any other seats really available so I wasn't conspicuous.
Later I saw that friend and got the courage to ask if the girl I was interested in was single and should I approach. She said,"Oh you mean "P" ... yes, sort of, and yes go for it. I asked what degree they were on, then left. I had a first name and a degree line.
My research into that degree revealed, she was only visiting our campus to use the workshop, but it also turns out that the studio she is normally in is the same one that my classmate's GF is in (call her F) because they are on the same course.
So now I've visited that studio, through F's unsuspecting kindness, under the guise of seeing the facilities to judge for a friend considering the program. The truth slowly rolled out, as I saw the lady I'm interested in and slid a small romantic poetic anonymous art note onto her table when she turned away. As F saw and watched me shy away from approaching her as we walked past the space, she kept encouraging me just to go talk. But I didn't want to intrude while she was working and in her work environment.
I don't know how to approach this. I have asked F to let me know when I should come to the studio to say hi. I went to the gallery she works at today on the off chance she was there, and now feel like sending a facebook message is a last resort. I have to leave for a week on an emergency trip back home tomorrow. Life is short.
Trouble is, I don't want to breech the fb borders yet, as I feel it could kill some of the mystery and magic of getting to know her irl. But then do I keep going around like a stranger trying to be at the same place at the same time as her and hope the moment is right and I'm not frozen when I see her...I don't want it to be awkward either.
What's the hive mind take on this?