How much to give, the value of wedding gift.
January 28, 2013 7:52 PM Subscribe
Close friends wedding coming up and need to know the right amount to spend on their gift registry, they have various items ranging from $40 upto $250. We're in Australia, details inside...
posted by Under the Sea to human relations (15 answers total) 1 user marked this as a favorite
Rule of thumb for my partner and I is to give, as a couple, $100 at friend weddings and $150 for family weddings (we don’t follow the “cover the cost per head” thing). The wedding in question however is costing me alot of money and I’m wondering if it’d be cool to give closer to $50-$75 than $100 (splitting hairs yes but.....)
I am a bridesmaid (MOH actually) and have accrued alot of expenses for this wedding so far (yes I take full responsibility for signing up to bridesmaid duties). Costs so far include an expensive hens weekend getaway ($350), new dress ($250), makeup & hair on the day ($165), transport costs to the wedding ($60) and engagement gift ($50). The engagement gift we would give in any event so possibly irrelevant. The wedding is a pretty laid-back affair where alot of people are chipping to help to keep their costs low.
As my contribution, the bride is borrowing my $10,000 former wedding dress & accessories. I was a bit shocked initially when I learnt I had to pay my own hair and makeup on the day as I thought she might cover that based on the dress loan but it’s cool, I’m over it now. I also arranged the hens weekend all by myself which was a massive +1month effort to coordinate. I made sure she had zero expenses for the 3 days of hens activities. I ended up being out of pocket (should've been closer to $250) as I didn’t get paid back by some of her other guests on the weekend for things (not her fault just the usual run-around). Ive been happy to do all that I can as she is a close mate so forgive me if it sounds like whinging. I’m also reaching the end of my pregnancy and naturally a bit worried about finances at the moment.
Based on all this, is it cool to give $50 or $75 for both my partner and I, given they have elected those amounts on their registry, or do we stick to our $100 rule in light of all the above? She is a life long friend & important to me so we want to be generous, however I feel Ive been incredibly generous to date whether she sees that or not, and a gift is a gift right - the value won't massively impact our ongoing friendship? FWIW the bride didn’t give a gift at my previous wedding (not that this is a major determining factor).