Help me not ruin my sister's wedding.
January 24, 2013 12:10 PM Subscribe
My younger sister is getting married, and there are a million ways this could go wrong for me. Help me not ruin her wedding.
posted by dekathelon to human relations (43 answers total) 3 users marked this as a favorite
My sister is getting married this summer. She's decided I'm going to be a bridesmaid (she lives in another country, so maid of honor isn't really a possibility), so I'm more or less obligated to go. The tickets are bought, the plans are made - and I'm scared as hell. There are a couple reasons:
* The wedding's in her country, so I won't know anyone but my family. Which means...
* She's inviting my father to the wedding. Which is her prerogative, but is also a problem. She keeps in touch on and off, but I have not spoken to him in approximately 8 years, with good reason. (basically, when I turned 18 and was no longer legally obligated to because of divorce mediation stuff.) The most contact I've had is curt emails every few months, and one of the last times we spoke was him yelling at me because I didn't respond to an e-card soon enough. This is pretty much the norm; he's, for lack of a better term, a drama queen, and every time my sister or I would go out with him it would turn into a fight. I don't see an open bar making this less likely, either. The thought of having to hold a polite conversation with him is terrifying, but it will probably be unavoidable. It might not just be him, either - according to my sister he's trying to invite a lot of people, which may or may not include whichever new girlfriend he has, who judging by what I know of him lately may or may not be my age. Unsurprisingly, there are few people I want to meet less.
* While we're on the subject, this probably should not bother me as much as it does, but you know, she's younger than me, which makes me feel kind of like a spinster aunt or the lead in The Taming of the Shrew - and not the cool Kat Stratford version, the actual shrewish version. She's marrying really young (22), and everyone involved knows it (it's in part so she can stay in the country), but still: our family dynamic was always that I was the smart one and she was the pretty/popular one, and given that it is probable that I'll still be extremely single by then, it doesn't do much for my self-esteem. I can't even imagine how my mother must feel.
So yeah. My mother and sister pretty much already warn me daily not to make a scene or ruin her wedding, and I really, really don't want that to happen too. But the whole thing honestly terrifies me and is just getting closer. How can I not fuck this up?