Did I just commit a hugely embarrasing Okcupid gaffe?

January 16, 2013 5:54 PM

I disabled my Okcupid account. When it asked Why? I checked "I met someone on Okcupid." This is true. I'm seeing 4 someones from Okcupid - obviously nothing serious or committed and all in early or very early stages of exploration. Four is overwhelming enough without tinkering with the site further. When the form asked who I met, I listed all four. After hitting submit I realized with terror that there is a chance okc might somehow notify these fellows that I listed them as "met someone." Please tell me I am wrong.
posted by anonymous to human relations (8 answers total)

I think it's to improve their algorithm.
posted by acidic at 6:06 PM on January 16

Yeah, I'm almost positive it doesn't notify them. Your account will just be listed as deleted if they try to look at it. No big deal.
posted by three_red_balloons at 6:10 PM on January 16 [2 favorites]

Yeah agreed with the above.

The only reason I'd sweat it is that the 4 women you're dating may either think that you're account has been closed because you're getting serious with them, or that you're cheating on someone with them. But those issues are unlikely and paranoid and don't worry about it.
posted by Kololo at 6:38 PM on January 16 [1 favorite]

OMG I THOUGHT WE WERE EXCLUSIVE!!!!

...kidding :)

A while ago, I was seeing someone I met on okc and we each deleted our accounts. I'm pretty sure she would have listed me as the person she was seeing when she deleted her account. I don't know that for a fact, but I'd be shocked if she didn't. I never got notified of anything. So, hopefully that helps to put your mind at ease at least a little.

The reason they ask that question is for the math. OKCupid is like one giant research project with millions of users worth of data. They spot trends in the massive piles of numbers, which certainly include stats on how often certain types of people don't just like each other or go on dates with each other, but actually start relationships with each other.

The math side of okcupid, in terms of statistics, is astounding. God, stats can be so much fun!!! I miss the days when those guys used to blog. If you haven't read the OKCupid blog (assuming that stuff is still accessible), you really should. It was absolutely fantastic.

tl;dr: You're safe. Have fun :)
posted by 2oh1 at 6:53 PM on January 16 [1 favorite]

From personal experience, they will not be notified.
posted by baby beluga at 7:02 PM on January 16 [2 favorites]

GF and I realized we had both done this and put each other's names in (aren't we cute) but neither of us received any notification about the other.
posted by PercussivePaul at 7:25 PM on January 16 [4 favorites]

Nope. Just for metrics.
posted by ead at 9:05 PM on January 16

My partner and I both just did this a few months ago, him a week or so before me. Neither of us got any notifications. You should be safe.
posted by ordinary_magnet at 8:46 AM on January 17