Telling my online dates that they were not the chosen ones
December 14, 2012 5:52 PM Subscribe
I was dating multiple people from OKcupid and Match, and now I've gotten serious with a guy I met outside of online dating and am no longer looking. Who should know?
posted by ponytime to human relations (13 answers total) 2 users marked this as a favorite
Most of the dates I went on it was just kind of obvious we weren't matches and there wasn't further communication, it fizzled out naturally. But there were two exceptions
1. A guy I went on two dates with. I thought after the second we were definitely not a match and that he must think it too because there was absolutely no indication of desire on either of our parts and I thought the second date was really awkward. I didn't hear from him for two weeks so I thought this was a fizzle out like the rest, but then I got a text today from him telling me he just got back from a long business trip and that he wanted to take me out again. Maybe I'm awkward, but I don't know how to respond. I want to let him down gently.
2. The second we went on three dates. I definitely felt like the third was a fizzle. We kissed afterwards, but it was not a good kiss and it was super-short. That was about a week ago and I haven't heard from him since. Should I feel obligated to tell him I'm not available anymore? I was thinking no, but then I got the text from #1 today and I worry he might be holding a flame too.
Thanks for your advice!