Teen time is supposed to be gift time
November 22, 2012 8:16 AM Subscribe
I wasn't able to give my niece a 13th birthday present a month and a half ago. What are some good ways I can correct this?
posted by anonymous to human relations (10 answers total) 1 user marked this as a favorite
I've been quite poor lately and depressed/anxious all year (and more), such that I barely had money for gas to get to my niece's 13th birthday dinner and not enough for a gift. My family is such that nobody will ever mention anything about this having happened, but I'm sure she noticed (as I would have). The effect will probably be to become more estranged than I already am.
This isn't to say I'm completely estranged. We all see each other a few times a year, birthdays and most major holidays, but I found out that she sent a family Thanksgiving email out this year that I didn't get, which tells me I'm more out of the loop than I really acknowledge. Anyway, I'm seeing a therapist and dealing with those larger issues, but my nephew's birthday dinner is this weekend so I'll be seeing them.
I'm thinking of putting her gift together for her, which I have intended to do all along, but since I don't see her very often it might seem a little cheesy to piggy-back it on my nephew's day. It also seems important to give her gift to her before her brother's birthday, since it would be bad form for him to get a gift and not her.
I guess my question is somewhat two-fold: the practicality of giving the gift, and whether and how and in what detail I could apologize and acknowledge what has happened. I could certainly take her out for something special, an afternoon together or something, but sad-but-true I feel a little too humiliated to do something like that.