How to give a male friend advice?
November 2, 2012 9:06 AM Subscribe
Men of Mefi please explain - how do I give advice to a man? My male friend gives me lots of good advice but never asks for any from me. How do I keep the ledger balanced?
posted by anonymous to Human Relations (43 answers total) 3 users marked this as a favorite
I'm a woman with a male friend. Our dynamic is that he frequently 'rescues me' with advice when things go wrong in my life. His advice is really good, and I feel better when I talk to him.
With a female friend, I would wait until they had problems and do the same for them, so there is reciprocation. This friend rarely tells me when he's in trouble although we have been close for a few years.
I feel guilty about the number of times he has given me good advice, without me ever doing the same for him. I know this wouldn't be a sustainable situation with my women friends, and am becoming worried enough that I've begun to avoid telling him when something's wrong.
How do I return the favor in this dynamic? Should I pry into his problems so that I can give him some advice? If not, how else can I 'balance' things up, other than giving him advice? I don't want to be taking all the time so that our friendship becomes parasitic.