Is our friendship over? How can I fix things?
October 25, 2012 1:47 PM Subscribe
Got into a bad argument with a friend. Is the friendship over? How can it be saved?
posted by impactsmoothie to human relations (37 answers total) 6 users marked this as a favorite
One of my best friends and I got into an argument two days ago. We both haven't been spending as much time together lately because he's been super busy with school and work. The last time we actually hung out and spent quality time together was maybe two months ago. We chat and text sporadically but it hasn't been the same.
So the other day he goes off on me because I had expressed that I was a little sad that he had plans to hang out with other friends and not me. He went off and said I'm the only friend he hangs out with, and that we're "attached at the hip." He said he hated that I was "guilt-tripping" him. This genuinely confused me because we haven't hung out in so long, and I rarely push him to do so, knowing that he's busy.
But anyway, he kept pushing me and it wasn't a good argument. I hate arguing over chat because I feel like things get misinterpreted and there's no way to tell what the actual tone and body language is. He was saying hurtful things, and so finally I said something I regretted and called him an effing asshole. I think he really was hurt by me swearing at him.
He texted me the next day and wanted to continue the argument via text and as saying that he doesn't trust me as a friend anymore because I always guilt-trip him and accuse him of replacing me. He said I'm no friend to him. So that's the end of our friendship. Just like that.
Today, I emailed him telling him I apologize for swearing at him and disrespecting him and that i really would like to talk about our issues and stay friends. I really value him as a friend and I absolutely hate it when we fight. I'm not ready to throw away years of friendship and good memories over this stupid fight. But he has been ignoring me all day. And I'm really just confused about what to do. How can I fix our friendship? Or should I just back off? Should I just let him go? Any help or guidance would be highly appreciated. Thanks!