oh no no bo bo!
August 28, 2012 11:09 AM Subscribe
im finding it hard to balance giving my new cat attention without reinforcing negative behavior. he seems starved for attention, but also shouldn't even be rewarded with even a glance when acting up. the problems seem small enough to nip in the bud. but how? are there any cat whispering techniques?
posted by c to Pets & Animals (29 answers total) 2 users marked this as a favorite
i apologize for this being all over the place. i have been reading every ask mefi about cats but of course i feel like a snowflake.
details & problems:
i rescued a tiny, very cute and bright eyed cat from the street, got him neutered, named him bo, and brought him home to my open but still not huge loft in brooklyn. he is about a year old. he is a great hunter of mice and flies. he does not bite or scratch. he seems smart.
my roommate isn't a cat person and does not hold a lot of warmness for him but tolerates him and feeds him as our shifted schedules dictate. he works nights and gets home late. i work from home and am trying to negotiate the fact that the cat cant be on my lap or desk. i attempt to remedy this by unceremoniously dumping him on the floor or banishing him to the common area where his food, litterbox, comfy couches are. i also go to a bf's house every weekend (which i guess i am learning isn't the best for giving the cat attention but i assumed a house cat can handle being left without mom for a few days.. especially when roommate is feeding cat.)
trauma from the neutering caused him to pee once on my roommate's (of course) bean bag chair about a week after being in the house. of course he went and peed there three more times after that.. and im either replacing the chair or trying to more permanently deep clean it.
he runs around our loft and is very vocal all day (cute sometimes annoying at night) and claws open all doors and gets on the AC and all this other typical cat stuff that now apparently irks my roommate who thinks its due to me not giving him enough attention. (im so busy working but still scratch and feed the cat, when i can..i mean i am still home all day with him!) i have had cats before but he seems so extra rowdy and needy.
just last night the cat strangely pooped on the roommates bed when he was not home. this may have followed my attempts to punish the cat for knocking a bunch of books down. i banished him to the common room because it was 4am and i needed to sleep.
i guess the real questions here are:
how do i appropriately train him to not be needy by giving him play time but also let him know pooping and crying for attention are bad and not things i give him attention for?
yes i use feliway, keep the litterbox clean, provide him with toys, boxes and treats. i have had the cat one month and the roommate has already suggesting giving him up (after this poop incident).
does this cat truly need my attention so much that i should not shack up at my boyfriend's on the weekend? i thought cats could be low maintenance.