Different parenting styles.
August 15, 2012 9:18 AM Subscribe
I have been married for around 5 years, it's a good marriage. My wife suffers from depression, which has made it difficult at times, however we have worked through these periods. Now we have a daughter, she is 11 months old and perfect in every way. My wife has very restrictive views on parenting, which are pretty different to mine, how do I manage this?
posted by anonymous to Human Relations (22 answers total) 6 users marked this as a favorite
My wife is a stay at home mother and I work a 9 - 5, which is about a 30 minute commute from our house. The main issue I am facing is that my wife is very restrictive on what our daughter can do, if it doesn't align with her schedule, our daughter is very well behaved.
We can no longer go out in the evenings at all, I would just like to be able to go family members houses for a meal, where our daughter can sleep. Also sometimes when I would like to do something by myself, I feel that she is using our daughter as an excuse to prevent me, its not like I want to do anything outrageous, but my wife always tries to make me feel guilty.
I feel like I am suffocating and I am really starting to resent my wife, this is detracting from my enjoyment with our daughter. I have tried discussing this with my wife numerous times, however it always ends in an argument where she curses at me and we gain nothing, she always has an excuse or a reason and there is no negotiating.
It feels like she has no respect for me, what I want and that she is just using our daughter to control me. It is also possible that she is jealous of my relationship with my family and she is using our daughter to prevent me from seeing them (and my friends). I feel this is all linked to her depression and also insecurity, I know she struggles with her depression, but this is destroying me.
Also to put this in perspective, I am not a lazy husband, I do a large amount of the house hold chores and I am important part of the care of our child.