You were bullied as a child, especially in gym class. You protected yourself from the mocking by being invisible and dropping those classes as soon as possible. You were embarrassed and afraid if people noticed the way you run or move. You didn't learn to dance because of this shame. As an adult, you have gotten over this fear/shame and have become physically fit and strong. How?
I was bullied as a child, especially in gym class. Now I'm an adult with horrible posture and the back/shoulder problems from that. I need
to get stronger, but this stuff still makes me want to hide in the corner.
Even non-gym activities trigger this. I don't dance. I don't like running in front of people. I don't like posing for the camera. I will automatically turn you down for volleyball or frisbee. I assume everyone knows that I look stupid doing any of those things, because it was drilled into me as a kid.
I've started one-on-one Pilates training, and my trainer is awesome and supportive. Despite her awesomeness and despite the fact that I actually like Pilates, I actually started crying half-way through one of my classes.
I couldn't beat the bullies as a kid, and now they're still echoing in my head. How do I beat them now?
My question is very similar to this question
, but I'm looking specifically for answers about the emotional/thinky part. I'm happy with Pilates, not looking for suggestions on a different activity.