Stuck babysitting and I want out.
April 16, 2012 4:40 PM Subscribe
How do I tell a friend I can't babysit for her anymore?
posted by Sweetmag to human relations (17 answers total)
I'm a stay a home mom with a 3yr old (girl) and a 5yr old (boy), who keep me on my feet all day with activities. A while back I got the insane "MUST HAVE A BABY" urge, but knew it wouldn't be a good decision for our family. Around the same time a friend of mine found out she was pregnant. In my lust to hold a baby, I offered to babysit for her when she went back to work. Fast forward to now, and I'm babysitting the most adorable 4 month old in the world. I've been babysitting him for the last month-month 1/2, and I completely forgot how much work they are (we are definitely not having any more children)! I am starting to exhaust and feel very frustrated with the current situation, realizing I need to stop babysitting him.
It's starting to bother my two that we can't really go out and do the things we would be doing the 3 days the babe is here. I also work very part-time, but am able to bring my children with me to work. On occasion if his dad can't take him by the time I need to be at work, I have to take the 4 month old with me. My job is a lot of in and out of the car for a few hours and it can be tiring with my little ones, but add the baby...ugh! My son attends preschool 3 days a week for half days, which let my daughter and I have mornings together. We would spend a lovely morning eating breakfast, cuddling on the couch, reading books, playing with toys, teaching her the preschool fundamentals and just having a good time. Ohh how I miss those days! *weep* My last complaint, is the child never sleeps. He won't nap and when he does he wakes in 15 minutes. He wants to be held constantly, which is the only way he will actually sleep longer than 15 minutes. But I can't hold/wear/carry around a baby for 2 hrs while he naps. He just needs so much attention (I know this is a common 4 month old problem)!
Also, this situation is seriously exhausting me. Between all my household duties, childcare, work, and just every day mommy/wife duties...I am TIRED to the max. This just can't go on any longer. I was tired before he started coming over, but this is a whole new level I'm not wanting to be in any more. I did tell her before this began that I can babysit until Fall (both kids will be in school!!).
Here's the problem. I'm not good at things like this. I can see myself babysitting him till fall, secretly complaining to my husband, and dreading it for the next 5 months. Just to avoid having this conversation. I mean, I did volunteer to babysit of my own free will. I should have known what I was getting into....It just feels so wrong to tell her I can't do it any more.
-Before I started babysitting, I did tell her I could only do it till Fall.
-She may or may not have her preschool class funded this summer. So there is a possibility that he won't be coming over after May.
- Would not just spring this on her without giving her adequate time to find other arrangements.
- I am a total people pleaser and will continue to babysit him to avoid conversation. If I can get my courage up, I have been known to show bravery and speak my mind ( I can probably count those times on one hand, but it happened!).
Should I suck it up and babysit him till at least the fall or should I, for my sanity and energy say I can't babysit? How do I tell her? Where can I buy a time machine to take me back to before I opened my big stupid mouth?