Help me be a better stay-at-home mom.
April 16, 2012 2:42 PM Subscribe
Stay at home parenting: how does it work?
posted by sutel to human relations (30 answers total) 26 users marked this as a favorite
For a variety of reasons, I quit my job after I had my second kid and I am now home with a 3-year-old girl and a four-month-old boy. Until very recently, the baby was really hard to handle - he has a milk protein allergy, reflux and is now getting over an ear infection. He is finally doing a lot better and is the happy content kind of baby I remember his sister being.
But dudes. This shit is HARD. My daughter is a firecracker - full of life and has tons of energy, but she is also incredibly demanding. She wants me to play with her all day long and gets really upset when I say that I have to feed the baby or put him down for a nap. I try to have as much one-on-one time with her but I can't do that all day long. Both kids want to be draped on me all day long and it drives me crazy - I am not a touchy-feely person and it feels like sensory overload sometimes.
Also, I am really tired all the time because my son keeps waking up from 3-5 am every single morning and my daughter gets up at 6:30 am. My husband will get up with her so I can sleep a bit more, but usually it's only for another hour or two. It's really not enough and right now I go to bed at 9pm. Sometimes 8 pm.
I'm also having a real hard time keeping up with household tasks, like keeping the house clean, laundry, etc. I do some cleaning when my husband gets home, once the kids are in bed, but oftentimes I am too tired and leave it for the morning. So the place is in shambles and I am way too embarrassed to have anyone over.
My husband does as much as he can in terms of childcare and domestic stuff but he works long hours.
My daughter goes to daycare twice a week, for full days, and we go to local playgroups some mornings. I have museum memberships that I use as often as I can. I definitely feel like I'm trying to do the best I can, but there are just some days when I am so tired and I turn the tv on for the 3-year-old just so I can have 20 minutes to myself, or at least 20 minutes where she is not bugging me with questions or demands for snacks. I just feel discouraged, like I suck at this whole thing. Someone is always crying, someone always needs a diaper change at the most inconvenient moment, and most days I can't even find the time to eat lunch.
Does this get better or easier or SOMETHING? Pat my head and tell me it's all going to be ok and that my kids aren't going to remember me being so crabby all the time.