Neighborly Peace, I'm looking for you.
March 30, 2012 2:18 PM Subscribe
How do I make peace with neighbors?
posted by mild deer to Human Relations (30 answers total) 4 users marked this as a favorite
I just moved into my new place 3-4 weeks ago. I live on the top floor of a triplex. A 30-somethings single man lives in a studio behind us and we never hear him. A family of three lives downstairs. They are occasionally loud during the day, and mostly respond when we ask for noise to be turned down at 10 or 11 PM.
The head-of-the-household downstairs is sometimes nice and sometimes yells at us for how loud our footsteps are. We tried to sympathize since we used to live on a bottom unit, but he just raised his voice and threatened to "bang on [our] fucking door" if he hears our footsteps past 10:00 PM. So far, he hasn't. And I've recorded and reported this incident to the management company.
We've made cookies for all of our neighbors, including the ones who live in the houses on either side of our triplex. It seems like there is no sense of community anywhere on this block. I'd like to change that, but am fast realizing that I can't.
Recently, I've discovered that our single male neighbor and downstairs neighbors hate each other. I also discovered that the dryer downstairs doesn't work. It takes 3 hours to dry a small load, or up to 18 hours to dry a large load. Passive aggressive notes have been left on the dryer because of this, but no one has bothered reporting the bad dryer. I finally reported it, and after two attempts, there is now a repairman downstairs replacing parts of the dryer.
I've shared this good news with our downstairs neighbor, and he just looked at me blankly, said "okay," and then closed the door. The other neighbor just argues a lot and hashes out the I've-been-living-here-for-years line and talks about how things don't need to change.
I want to live in a place with community, but probably won't be getting that. How do I look at this situation? How should I better communicate to bring a little more peace to this triplex?