Two lesbians eating out (in restaurants) – how to get good service.
March 5, 2012 9:52 AM Subscribe
What are some ways my partner and I (two women) can signal to restaurant staff that we are on a date and hope to receive service similar to straight couples?
posted by tr0ubley to Food & Drink (25 answers total) 6 users marked this as a favorite
My partner and I enjoy dining out quite a bit. We tend to eat at restaurants in the middle to high price range. We always make reservations, often order expensive items on the menu, and always tip at least 20%. We eat out a lot, so are pretty well versed in fine dining etiquette. However, I often feel like restaurant staff treat us differently when they encounter two women rather than the male-female pair they typically serve. For example, even though we have a reservation I feel like often we are given a bad table (like one near the kitchen door) and they reserve the better tables for [straight] couples looking for a romantic evening. Recently we went out for Valentines Day and were not told of the 3 course special for two, and only learned of it when our waitress mentioned it to the straight couple who came in after us. Finally, we are often not given a wine list unless we ask, because perhaps the waitstaff find it odd that two women would split a bottle of wine.
We currently live in the Midwest but have noticed similar treatment on both coasts as well.
So how do we signal to waitstaff that we want them to pull out all the stops – we want to hear the best and most expensive specials, we want a good bottle of wine, a secluded table, and that we will order and tip accordingly? I have the utmost respect for people who make their living in the food service industry, and I do not think the treatment we received was malicious in the slightest. I would simply like a subtle way of signaling our intentions at the beginning of the meal.