The longest cat and mouse game
February 19, 2012 9:24 PM Subscribe
He's not over his ex. I suppose I just have to go away and wait to see if he ever pursues me...
posted by GIRLesq to Human Relations (39 answers total) 3 users marked this as a favorite
In high school, a good 20 years ago, there was a boy who was always pursuing me but I just never was available. Years passed and he would pop back up (just before he married he phoned to ask me if there would ever be a chance ... I said I was moving and it seemed unlikely ... They divorced within a year). A few months ago he tracked me down. This time, he was set to marry the mother of his 3 year old child, she ran off with another man. They've been apart about 6 months.
For whatever reason, the timing for me is right. I am crazy about him. We went on a few dates, and then he goes on for 3 hours about the baby's mother. I listened and was supportive and then said he should have some professional counseling and call me when he thinks he's ready to date. Of course, after a couple of weeks he wanted to spend time together as friends, I agreed. Of course, we were all over each other and I had to re-commit to not seeing him and told him so. He reluctantly accepted.
I guess I already know the answer is that I just can't see him or speak to him frequently. I don't want to be second string or a rebound and he is so clearly deeply fixated on the ex. I don't want to let another long span of time pass but I can't think of any way to finally turn this 25 year cat-and-mouse relationship into something real permanent.
I have no choice but to just get on with my life right? I can't call, I can't see him (even if he asks)?