Failed out of second year of pharmacy school and was suspended, how can I improve?
February 11, 2012 8:00 PM Subscribe
Suspended from pharmacy school; how can I improve my studying skills and find out what problems I need to fix for the future?
I failed 3 courses ( each course = 3 units; total 9 credits) in one semester of pharmacy school of pathophysiology/therapeutics/pharmacology. I’m in my second year of pharmacy school. Long story short, I went through a wild ride this past semester in dealing with the health of a family member and coping with my own depression. I went through the Academic Committee and presented my case where I was later told of their decision to suspend me from school and come back in the fall to retake the courses. After having to go through the emotionally draining and overwhelming process of having to leave and handle numerous decisions: move, breaking my lease, exit financial counseling, talk with my advisor/another professor, etc. – I have now moved back home with my parents. I am in my late twenties (almost thirty) and feel like a failure. I suppose things could be worse and I could have been dismissed from school; but one of the biggest frustrations now is that there aren’t many options for me until I return in August for school. Since I have been suspended I am no longer a "student" and so my loans go into repayment in the next six months. Moreover, if I try to take classes at another institution in the summer, those course credits won't transfer into my school because I was on suspension and the courses themselves would be very expensive to take. Also, my loans only apply towards courses that I take towards my pharmacy degree, so even if was interested in taking a business course, I would have to apply for more loans that would be specific towards getting a business/MBA degree. So, I am essentially in process of applying/looking for jobs as a pharmacy technician part time and re-studying the materials I failed in.
My depression subsided quite a bit and my medications have even out my mood. I also went to see an outside therapist last semester as I was on the verge of a melt down: I was growing increasingly anxious that I would take my final exams and fail all of my exams. I also went through an internal crisis about whether I should just leave school altogether and whether I am even good enough to cut it. I passed the rest of my other courses worth eight credits.
I am now moved back home with my parents and find myself fairly depressed at my life. This is suppose to be a time where I can figure out my study habits better and take some time to get my act together so that I can come back stronger in the fall. However, I find myself pretty down and hopeless about life. One aspect of taking these pathophysiology /therapeutics/pharmacology courses was that we had an exam roughly every seven to ten days and were not permitted to look at our exams. Too many students in the past have cheated in some form that the new course policy was to ban anyone from looking at their old exams and the questions to see why/what they had gotten wrong – we were only allowed to see our grades. During this time I found myself with scores hovering around 52-57 range and did not know why I got I picked the wrong answers. Besides the external circumstances affecting my studying, this aspect with the course itself was frustrating/hopeless to me.
Moreover, I tried getting a tutor but with the speed/volume of the material – it is hard to articulate this, but studying with a “tutor” was difficult. There are twelve to fourteen lectures worth of material in every exam with at least four or more different instructors teaching various topics. I find myself pretty much in a crisis of wondering whether I can even handle the material at all, let alone knowing really what I am deficient in or how to study better. The thing is, my classmates have all succeeded in moving into the spring semester so they were able to handle the 17 credits of science courses in the semester and had the same issues with not being able to see their old exams to find out their mistakes but yet still being able to pass.
I just feel now that living at home I should be doing more to study but don’t have the motivation or drive to study every day on my own. I also feel like I should be using this time to build my discipline and prepare myself for the upcoming year so I don’t fail again but it is just that I sleep in; waste time during the day and only study a couple of hours every day and then go to the gym. I really don’t know what my problem is and I’m sad. I know that I do want to become a pharmacist and before I went to pharmacy school I was in graduate school; and prior to that studied engineering and then switched over to biology. I just feel like pharmacy school is so tough and I’m too old and dumb for any of this.
My father has given me the cold shoulder and living at home has only been manageable because my mother has tried to mitigate the situation of tension between us. My father just told me that if I fail again, I shouldn’t be in science and just go get any job; he is tired of me and says I am too old to be doing this. I've dissapointed him so many times before in life, and I think at this age and at this point, they are just tired of having to deal with me but are putting up with me for the time being by being silent with the occasional verbal slashing about my competency in life. They aren't quite angry but just now at a point of apathy for me.
I feel so sad and at a loss really to motivate myself to study and at the time, find out how really to improve my study habits so that I can better cope with the materials this second time around. I think it will be even more stressful to study the materials and take exams again hoping I won’t fail again when I wasn’t able to identify the real problem the first time around.
Sorry for the rambling but there are so many problems right now, that I really don’t know how to improve myself or what I can do to get better….or how to change, because I really do. But I wonder if I really want to change, then why don't I do it? And another level, I wonder what I really have to do to change because I haven't identified the problem(s) of my failure.
How can I study the materials better in the future? How can I fix my problems? Feeling hopeless and could use some constructive reasoning or advice on what to do. I can blame some of the external situations I was going through but a bulk of the problem was my studying skills/habits/testing techniques. I've already talked to the course masters and professors about this issue but they seem understanding yet unyielding on their policy not to let students see their past exams. Moroever, when I asked for their advice on how to study they also seemed to tell me to start earlier or study harder which isn't helpful.
Feeling Hopeless e-mail me at 555xyz555 at gmail dot com
I failed 3 courses ( each course = 3 units; total 9 credits) in one semester of pharmacy school of pathophysiology/therapeutics/pharmacology. I’m in my second year of pharmacy school. Long story short, I went through a wild ride this past semester in dealing with the health of a family member and coping with my own depression. I went through the Academic Committee and presented my case where I was later told of their decision to suspend me from school and come back in the fall to retake the courses. After having to go through the emotionally draining and overwhelming process of having to leave and handle numerous decisions: move, breaking my lease, exit financial counseling, talk with my advisor/another professor, etc. – I have now moved back home with my parents. I am in my late twenties (almost thirty) and feel like a failure. I suppose things could be worse and I could have been dismissed from school; but one of the biggest frustrations now is that there aren’t many options for me until I return in August for school. Since I have been suspended I am no longer a "student" and so my loans go into repayment in the next six months. Moreover, if I try to take classes at another institution in the summer, those course credits won't transfer into my school because I was on suspension and the courses themselves would be very expensive to take. Also, my loans only apply towards courses that I take towards my pharmacy degree, so even if was interested in taking a business course, I would have to apply for more loans that would be specific towards getting a business/MBA degree. So, I am essentially in process of applying/looking for jobs as a pharmacy technician part time and re-studying the materials I failed in.
My depression subsided quite a bit and my medications have even out my mood. I also went to see an outside therapist last semester as I was on the verge of a melt down: I was growing increasingly anxious that I would take my final exams and fail all of my exams. I also went through an internal crisis about whether I should just leave school altogether and whether I am even good enough to cut it. I passed the rest of my other courses worth eight credits.
I am now moved back home with my parents and find myself fairly depressed at my life. This is suppose to be a time where I can figure out my study habits better and take some time to get my act together so that I can come back stronger in the fall. However, I find myself pretty down and hopeless about life. One aspect of taking these pathophysiology /therapeutics/pharmacology courses was that we had an exam roughly every seven to ten days and were not permitted to look at our exams. Too many students in the past have cheated in some form that the new course policy was to ban anyone from looking at their old exams and the questions to see why/what they had gotten wrong – we were only allowed to see our grades. During this time I found myself with scores hovering around 52-57 range and did not know why I got I picked the wrong answers. Besides the external circumstances affecting my studying, this aspect with the course itself was frustrating/hopeless to me.
Moreover, I tried getting a tutor but with the speed/volume of the material – it is hard to articulate this, but studying with a “tutor” was difficult. There are twelve to fourteen lectures worth of material in every exam with at least four or more different instructors teaching various topics. I find myself pretty much in a crisis of wondering whether I can even handle the material at all, let alone knowing really what I am deficient in or how to study better. The thing is, my classmates have all succeeded in moving into the spring semester so they were able to handle the 17 credits of science courses in the semester and had the same issues with not being able to see their old exams to find out their mistakes but yet still being able to pass.
I just feel now that living at home I should be doing more to study but don’t have the motivation or drive to study every day on my own. I also feel like I should be using this time to build my discipline and prepare myself for the upcoming year so I don’t fail again but it is just that I sleep in; waste time during the day and only study a couple of hours every day and then go to the gym. I really don’t know what my problem is and I’m sad. I know that I do want to become a pharmacist and before I went to pharmacy school I was in graduate school; and prior to that studied engineering and then switched over to biology. I just feel like pharmacy school is so tough and I’m too old and dumb for any of this.
My father has given me the cold shoulder and living at home has only been manageable because my mother has tried to mitigate the situation of tension between us. My father just told me that if I fail again, I shouldn’t be in science and just go get any job; he is tired of me and says I am too old to be doing this. I've dissapointed him so many times before in life, and I think at this age and at this point, they are just tired of having to deal with me but are putting up with me for the time being by being silent with the occasional verbal slashing about my competency in life. They aren't quite angry but just now at a point of apathy for me.
I feel so sad and at a loss really to motivate myself to study and at the time, find out how really to improve my study habits so that I can better cope with the materials this second time around. I think it will be even more stressful to study the materials and take exams again hoping I won’t fail again when I wasn’t able to identify the real problem the first time around.
Sorry for the rambling but there are so many problems right now, that I really don’t know how to improve myself or what I can do to get better….or how to change, because I really do. But I wonder if I really want to change, then why don't I do it? And another level, I wonder what I really have to do to change because I haven't identified the problem(s) of my failure.
How can I study the materials better in the future? How can I fix my problems? Feeling hopeless and could use some constructive reasoning or advice on what to do. I can blame some of the external situations I was going through but a bulk of the problem was my studying skills/habits/testing techniques. I've already talked to the course masters and professors about this issue but they seem understanding yet unyielding on their policy not to let students see their past exams. Moroever, when I asked for their advice on how to study they also seemed to tell me to start earlier or study harder which isn't helpful.
Feeling Hopeless e-mail me at 555xyz555 at gmail dot com
Hey could you memail me? I actually have a lot to say about this...went through something similar.
posted by carpediem at 9:38 PM on February 11, 2012
posted by carpediem at 9:38 PM on February 11, 2012
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posted by facetious at 8:17 PM on February 11, 2012 [4 favorites]