My mom needs travel buddies

July 5, 2005 8:30 AM

My single, 59 year old mother wants to take a vacation in the next 2 months, but has no one to accompany her.

Ideally, my mother would like to visit the New England/Eastern Canada area. She was signed up for a bus tour, but it was cancelled (probably due to high fuel prices) and there are no other tours from her region still available.

Mom is an eccentric, intellectual type. She would be miserable on any kind of typical Seniors tour to Atlantic City or outlet shopping malls. She'd be interested in visiting beautiful scenery, gardens, art museums and historical sites.

She has never flown or traveled long distances all by herself. I think she could fly to New England alone, but what's the point of renting a car and touring around lonesome?

What I need, honestly, is a traveling summer camp for my mom. Some way I can put her on a plane from Point A to Point B, knowing that at Point B there will be a group of interesting people who could take her around and show her neat stuff for a few days.

posted by junkbox to travel & transportation (10 comments total)

but what's the point of renting a car and touring around lonesome

I've actually done this quite a few times and enjoy it; I can go at my own pace, I don't have to worry that my travel companions are bored/tired/hungry/need to go to the bathroom/etc. I can visit places that others might find boring. I keep a travel journal and take pictures and it's all about the experience. I keep a light, flexible itinerary (in the form of a list of things I might want to do from the research I'd done pre-trip) and then figure out what I'm in the mood to do that particular day.

Others' mileage might vary, I know a lot of people who prefer to have more structure.
posted by superkim at 8:49 AM on July 5, 2005

Maybe this is stating the obvious, but have you checked with any clubs/societies that correspond to her interests? My mom frequently goes on bus trips with her local watercolor artists' society -- the group is fairly diverse in age. A friend's folks belong to the local garden-enthusiasts group and similarly go on organized tours.
posted by desuetude at 9:16 AM on July 5, 2005

Staying in hostels would give your mom quite a lot of fun -- in my experience people in hostels are very sociable and helpful -- while letting her travel at her own pace. Like superkim I love being able to do what I want when I want: "it's all about me!"

Fwiw I'm a 61 yo man, but I don't think gender makes much difference, it's the personality type that matters in this. It wouldn't do for your mother if she isn't happy by herself.
posted by anadem at 9:17 AM on July 5, 2005

ELDERHOSTELS!! seem to be a great way to go. Reasonable cost, interesting people, interesting classes. I've looked at the catalogs, but have never gone myself, mostly because of competing attractions. But I have friends who love them. I think you have to be 55 or over or traveling with someone who is. They fill up, so your mom's choices will be more limited if she wants to go in the next 2 months, but there may well be something she'd be interested in.
posted by judybxxx at 9:46 AM on July 5, 2005

Second that notion.
My mother-in-law loves Elderhostel trips. She's a NY intellectual art historian and takes trips that interest her in that realm (Denmark, France, Turkey, Lithuania (OK, not all art), South Carolina (Arts and Crafts movement), etc.) They have classes in the am as part of the trip taught by local professors, then in the pm go see what they have learned about. Everything is worked out, she always meets interesting people, and they have a fair amount of spare time for individual interests. She has also taken my son with her on special intergenerational trips for grandparents and grandchildren. They both had a great time.
posted by johngumbo at 11:09 AM on July 5, 2005

I'll take her.

Seriously, my lease is up middle of August, I'm moving from St. Louis to Colorado but as yet don't have a specific place to stay or work. I'd definitely play tour guide/traveling companion for your mom for a couple months, in exchange for my way paid. (Did that phrasing make sense? I mean if travel, room and board for me are covered.)

Not that I've ever been to that area, either, but hey, that's another reason for me to go! I'm a good researcher, I'll find us stuff to do.
posted by attercoppe at 2:28 PM on July 5, 2005

What about an alumni club from her alma mater? Depending on the school, they may have interesting trips available. My husband used to work for the alumni association for his college and they planned all kinds of cool trips.

Another possibility is taking one of those college summer courses that are really just an excuse to travel somewhere.

Culinary vacations are another possibility, if your mom enjoys cooking and wine. The Culinary Institute of America runs programs in Hyde Park, New York, and California. Here's some info on a program in France that I've heard good things about (and always wanted to go to).
posted by Sully6 at 3:10 PM on July 5, 2005

Here are some options:

1. Find a young, but capable family member to escort her. There's likely an older teenager somewhere in your brood who would love to go someplace cool but suffers from overprotective parents who require an escort.

2. If she's religious, contact a church of her denomination in the region she plans to visit. They will likely be able to connect her with several willing and excited members who would host her and take her on day trips.

3. Post something on craigslist.org seeking a tour guide for the region she's visiting.

4. An obvious one: tell everyone you know that she's seeking a vacation partner. Tell her to do the same. Word of mouth works, yo.
posted by cior at 3:57 PM on July 5, 2005

Joining clubs which go with her interests is a good call. Obviously, talk to friends and family about it. Someone might be interested.

I know nothing about it, but Elderhostels sound like they might fit what she's looking for.

Good luck with it. Eastern Canada is a nice part of the world.
posted by Count Ziggurat at 6:26 PM on July 5, 2005

I was on a ferry to Alaska at the same time as an Elderhostel and it seemed like a pretty good way to go. You're with a group of active seniors [your Mom would definitely be on the young end of the group] who, if this group is any indication are lively, pretty interesting and up for meeting new people. There is a mix of older couples and single folks [mostly single women] and it's not a dating scene but people generally get together for lunch/dinner. During the day there are a lot of different things to do which you can join in on or not as you want. We were all on a ferry together for seven days so I'm not sure what this ratio looks like when you're on land but I bet they try to mix it up some. The only complaint I've really heard about them is that they're not cheap, the tours are more expensive than just going it on your own, but less expensive than high-end package vacation and the accomodations are somewhat less fancy than your average hotel [think hostel-style].

That said, if she'd like a place to stay and an on-again-off-again tour guide, she's welcome to come stay with us in Vermont for a few days at the end of September when it's sure to be lovely. If she rents a car I'll happily drive around with her and load her up with places to see on days that I'm working. I bet there are a few day tours she could sign up with and intersperse them with some tooling around on her own.
posted by jessamyn at 7:15 PM on July 5, 2005