Comments on: Grad. School Gift Bag

Question: Grad. School Gift Bag

.kobayashi. — Sat, 25 Jun 2005 17:36:12 -0800

If you were putting together a fun, funny, gift box for a friend who was about to enter grad school, what would you want to put into it?

By: mokujin

mokujin — Sat, 25 Jun 2005 17:39:33 -0800

cyanide capsule.

By: LarryC

LarryC — Sat, 25 Jun 2005 17:51:50 -0800

A guidebook to local outdoor activities, to remind him or her to get some air. A gift card at a coffee shop, because coffee is scholarship in its liquid form. A calling card, with your phone number written on the back. A copy of whatever citation guide is used for the discipline--MLA, Turabian, whatever. A bottle of something special.

By: realcountrymusic

realcountrymusic — Sat, 25 Jun 2005 17:53:23 -0800

Aww, that's nice. And I was gonna say pot.

By: oflinkey

oflinkey — Sat, 25 Jun 2005 18:19:23 -0800

If you have the room, whatever he or she drinks (that is, soda, water, juices) and some healthy snacks. I am talking large quantities of these-- one of the best gifts I got while in grad school was a case of soda. It kept me alive.

By: elisabeth r

elisabeth r — Sat, 25 Jun 2005 18:25:40 -0800

Something coffee-related- a pound of good beans, a travel mug.

A pair of really comfortable pajama pants (indispensable for marathon paper-writing and study sessions).

If they have an office, glade plug-ins. My office in grad school had no windows and the air was always stuffy and stale. The grapefruit-scented plug-ins really helped the atmosphere.

By: duck

duck — Sat, 25 Jun 2005 18:56:42 -0800

If the person is a caffeine junkie and likely to become more of a caffeine junkie, then do a caffeine gift basket: Not just coffee, but also caffeneitted caramels, caffeneitted gum, caffeneited soap, caffeneited body lotion etc. etc., and of course a Barista action figure.

By: stefnet

stefnet — Sat, 25 Jun 2005 18:58:13 -0800

This travel mug, a gift certificate to the office supply store closest to them (because school supplies are fun!), a big hooded sweatshirt from the school they're entering (myself and fellow grad students like pulling the hood up tight while writing papers, almost like blinders to everything else and, since you are a poor grad student, you probably don't have the heat on in your apartment and the hood and front pocket for your hands in breaks helps to stay warm).

I'm sure there are more things, but that's off the top of my head.

By: awegz

awegz — Sat, 25 Jun 2005 19:04:16 -0800

As someone in their last quarter of grad school I'd recommend a flash drive, rolls of quarters for laundry (if they live in a building where they have to pay), ingredients for PB&J (that's all I eat right now), advil, and numbers for all the really late-night delivery places in the area. And definitely include good booze of some sort.

If it's a "she" or a well-groomed male, maybe get them a gift certificate at a local spa or salon -- luxuries like highlights, pedicures, and massages, were the first to go.

By: scarabic

scarabic — Sat, 25 Jun 2005 19:53:59 -0800

Lots of Emergen-C

By: Arch Stanton

Arch Stanton — Sat, 25 Jun 2005 20:50:02 -0800

Some pre-printed IOU cards.

By: Goofyy

Goofyy — Sat, 25 Jun 2005 22:14:38 -0800

I bottle of "Extra-Strength Screwitall", sold in gag gift stores. (candy tablets, a play on the Extra-Strength Tylenol scare).

A spray bottle of something harmless (Ozium?), labeled "Under-grad repellant".

If male, a bottle of lubricant suitable for self-pleasure.

A box of [crackers/cookies/cereal?] with photoshopped label to read (with appropriate trademarks) "Purina Grad Chow"

By: sled

sled — Sat, 25 Jun 2005 22:43:15 -0800

A notebook, a Bible, some ibuprofen, twenty dollars, gift certificates to fast food, a little LED flash light, cheap breathalyzer, index cards, new keychain, and a little basket to keep next to the door.

Mostly, just a hug for luck. :)

By: Rumple

Rumple — Sat, 25 Jun 2005 23:30:10 -0800

The flash drive idea is brilliant.

Office supplies *are* fun -- some of those little book page post-its, some nice binder-clips and other paper-clippie things, and also a high quality stapler. If they have a laptop, then a security cord is nice. That and the flash drive could really save their bacon.

Lots of other good ideas up above. Some blackout-goggles for library naps? Some good earplugs or noise-cancelling earphones? A pro flickr account? Some nice small notebooks? A book along these lines?

By: Schismatic

Schismatic — Sun, 26 Jun 2005 04:32:07 -0800

As a grad student myself, I second the notion that you should emphasize the life that isn't academia. One of the greatest aspects of grad school is that you surround yourself with people in one field of study and absorb information and culture like nothing else. Unfortunately, it also means that you sometimes forget to have a life outside of school, and I never feel healthy in the long term without that. So maybe a guidebook or even something more specific to hiking/camping in the area.

Also, if their department is anything like mine, liquor is never a bad thing to have around. Makes friends, if nothing else.

By: realcountrymusic

realcountrymusic — Sun, 26 Jun 2005 05:45:25 -0800

You know, the flash drive idea is great. But if you can spring for it, consider giving her/him a real large-capacity hard drive. I'm a professor, and a former grad student. About once a year tragedy strikes some grad student I know because s/he did not have a safe backup of her/his work, including in one case (last year) a student whose dissertation was entirely on a laptop that was stolen. This can well-nigh end one's grad school career, and cause huge psychic trauma. For about $120 you can get a decent 60 or 80GB external drive, and maybe throw in some backup software and advice -- "back up regularly, and keep this drive somewhere safe." You would be amazed how many students (like everyone else) live on the edge about data safety, and in the case of putting in 5 or so years of work, that's a giant disaster if one's luck runs bad. A flash drive, over time, won't be big enough.

Or if you are really generous, how about an iPod that can also be used for data backup?

But don't forget the pot.

By: languagehat

languagehat — Sun, 26 Jun 2005 07:10:49 -0800

And the cyanide. [/bitter ex-grad student]

I confess I didn't have the faintest idea what a "flash drive" was, but I do now thanks to Google, so this has been a very educational thread.

By: realcountrymusic

realcountrymusic — Sun, 26 Jun 2005 07:30:17 -0800

I hear cynaide has a bitter taste as well

By: awegz

awegz — Sun, 26 Jun 2005 08:06:07 -0800

You're not alone languagehat. I didn't really become familiar with 'em until I went to grad school. EVERYONE carries them on their keychains. They're especially useful when you're working on big projects in computer labs and jumping from one computer to another.

There are all sorts of fun things you can do with a USB flash drive (on PCstats via Lifehacker via Make).

By: LarryC

LarryC — Sun, 26 Jun 2005 09:26:39 -0800

Jeez, why all the bitterness towards grad school? It is a great intellectual adventure. Your friend could well love every minute.

A couple more ideas: A good cookbook of easy but healthy recipes. Jane Brody got me through without ruining my health, but maybe on of those books that advertises simplicity and a low number of ingredients would be better. If they don't have a bicycle, that would make a great gift. You could buy an old 3 speed at a garage sale, add a big basket and some funky accessories (a horn, spoke beads, a lock), spray paint it some wild color. A nice book bag.

By: floanna

floanna — Sun, 26 Jun 2005 10:37:19 -0800

The best funny/cheeky gift box i've ever received was from my college mates and was themed around a date night. Something similar might be fun for a college student but you need them to open it with you to explain the reasoning behind it (or they might get offended).

It contained (from what I remember - it was a long time ago):
• A joke can of 'femfresh' in prep for some attention later on in the evening ;)
• A bottle of wine and a corkscrew for drinks with my date
• Toothpicks to get rid of any food after a meal in prep for a snog
• Lots of condoms (no explanation needed)
• A pack of throat lozenges called 'Throaties' because I used to complain of a sore throat after certain 'jobs' ;) That was the funniest of all the pressies!

By: craniac

craniac — Sun, 26 Jun 2005 11:59:20 -0800

I second the flash drive.

Also:

1. getting what you came for.
2. the book "learned optimism" by Seligman, so you don't get consumed by cynicism
3. a copy of the article/chapter "Habits of Productive Scholarly Writers"

Not funny stuff, but useful.

/almost done, still bitter

By: languagehat

languagehat — Sun, 26 Jun 2005 14:46:02 -0800

Oh yeah, and tell them to bookmark Invisible Adjunct. It hasn't been updated since a year ago, but the archives are an invaluable source of useful information for those suffering the grad-school experience and trying to figure out what comes next.

By: realcountrymusic

realcountrymusic — Sun, 26 Jun 2005 15:50:18 -0800

If you are going down the "useful book" road, Howard Becker's *Tricks of the Trade* and a subscription to *Lingua Franca.*

By: sanitycheck

sanitycheck — Sun, 26 Jun 2005 16:08:37 -0800

Or if you're going down the "funny book" road, how about one of the PhD comic books and a package of ramen?

By: kenko

kenko — Sun, 26 Jun 2005 16:39:39 -0800

Lingua Franca still exists? Did it not go tits-up in 2001? So claims my copy of Quick Studies.

By: realcountrymusic

realcountrymusic — Sun, 26 Jun 2005 18:47:00 -0800

You are correct. I stopped reading LF after grad school and hadn't noticed its disappearance. No great loss.

By: craniac

craniac — Sun, 26 Jun 2005 19:02:58 -0800

Oooh, the ear plugs are a great idea. Go to Walmart and get the orange foam 29db Smith and Wessons.

Get them a yoga session gift certificate at the local [name for yoga place]

By: gesamtkunstwerk

gesamtkunstwerk — Sun, 26 Jun 2005 19:21:22 -0800

I second the idea of a guide book, information of activities to do off campus, or healthy recreation. Hell, even movie passes can be a life saver.

The best thing you can do is keep your friend in touch with the real world, with people who aren't bitter, sarcastic and insecure. There are people like this in graduate school, but not as many as there should be.

I liked parts of graduate school, and was only really unhappy when I had no life outside of campus.