What are acceptable ways to essentially tell someone "I'm just not that into you" while minimizing the hurt factor? Caveat: you're in the middle of the first or second date.
So you're on a first date and you realize that you're just not feeling any chemistry. Maybe you're not physically attracted but would still like to be friends, maybe you are
physically attracted but feel like this person might be a bad influence otherwise, maybe you like them in every way but they have a dealbreaker like smoking too much or wanting kids when you don't. Trouble is, the other person thinks you're great, and
they're part of your social circle so you see each other at least once a week. You still need to finish the date, but you don't want to lead them on about any future dates.
What do you tell them, and when? Specifically, what exact words
do you use? What is your script?
I've seen this thread
. It seems like Miko's excellent advice
is for breaking up after you've been seeing each other for a while and might be a bit overkill here. This is more like, what do you say when you're out on the first date, or maybe the second date, and you realize it's just not going to work out? Especially if this person has just paid for your dinner, and you weren't sure how you really felt until they kissed you and you just didn't feel much of anything. Also, please assume for this question that both of you are poly and looking, so variations on "There is someone else I'm interested in" or "My ex and I have been talking and might get back together" or "I don't have time for another relationship" are largely irrelevant.
(This is not about a situation currently in progress, I'm just asking for my own future reference.)