Bachelorette gift help!

December 3, 2011 11:46 AM

Help! Best friend's bachelorette party in less than 48 hours and I still have no idea what gift to get her...

She's very down to earth, loves classical and British literature, likes to write and draw, is very Christian, and she's a doctor. I don't want to give her anything sexy/'sleazy' or cheesy. (Her bachelorette party is not very typical/traditional; it is being held at a cooking school and includes some of her good male friends, not just female friends.).

We've been friends since we were little kids, I'm her bridesmaid and I'm still stumped on what to get her. I want to give her something that will honor and celebrate her upcoming wedding, not just any gift that I could give her for her birthday or Christmas. (or am I overthinking this?)

(Anonymous because I'm supposed to keep details of her party secret since the venue is a surprise...)

posted by anonymous to shopping (16 answers total)

We received a Lladro statue (similar to this one) as a wedding gift (it actually served as the cake topper) and have always treasured it.
posted by jquinby at 11:51 AM on December 3, 2011

What about one of those classic-looking nicely bound novels like this with a heartfelt inscription? A novel featuring a wedding/love/coupledom might be nice for the occasion.
posted by jabes at 11:52 AM on December 3, 2011

How about a nice bound journal for memories of her married life?
posted by bq at 12:33 PM on December 3, 2011 [1 favorite]

You didn't say what your price range is, so I will suggest you buy her the greatest gift that a human can ever give to another human: Gretsch White Falcon. True, it is sexy. But not in a sleazy way.

But, if you don't want to spend that much money and the party is a ta cooking school, give her a really nice knife. You can crack some sort of joke about marriage and needing a knife or something. But a really nice knife is a brilliant gift for anyone who might someday decide to cook something.
posted by The World Famous at 12:38 PM on December 3, 2011

Do you have photos of her and her fiance?

Maybe you could make something.

For a retirement gift, I used Powerpoint to make a collage of photos and then got it put in a nice frame and matting.

Or a cookbook of romantic meals.

Or something (a photo frame?) engraved with their names.
posted by maurreen at 1:04 PM on December 3, 2011

Knives and scissors are traditionally considered bad luck and gifts.
posted by bq at 1:10 PM on December 3, 2011

Well since she's thoughtful and also traditional, something that will reinforce the welcome changes of marriage? So, like, marriage is about a bunch of different things to different people but for someone who falls into the categories of "very Christian" and "down to earth" and "loves classical literature" it's probably a good bet that to her, her marriage is about the start and establishment of a new home with her partner. Or, if not a new home, a large change of life that she'll really want to feel grounded and stable in, before long.

So that's the sort of thing you get traditional wedding presents for, the "registry" and picking the china patterns and stuff. Toasters and serving platters, you know?. But it could also be something more unique to her and her fiance. Is there something that she could only enjoy while in a home, with someone else, that you are in a position to give her? This could be anything from a really nice set of sheets (perhaps there are some sexy connotations there you want to avoid, but it's pretty classy as far as bachelorette gifts go), to a set of lovely wine glasses, or maybe something utilitarian for a house, but decorated to evoke a shared joke or memory between the two of you? Basically, figure out what she's expecting to change in her life from the wedding, and choose something that will help her enjoy whatever that change is. That's why bridal shower gifts have the tradition of raunchiness - because the sex was a change to embrace! But there are lots of other changes, too, and since you've been friends for so long I'm sure you know better than me what those will be for her.

I think the idea of a journal is a good one, too. Be sure to get unlined paper in it, since you said she likes to draw as well as write. You could make an insert of a few pages in the front before you wrap it, with the date and invitation to the shower and a little note from you. That way if she wants to use the journal for something else and not to chronicle her wedding, or perhaps if she's doing a scrapbook sort of thing in another format, she can use your insert without cutting up the journal, or leave it as-is.
posted by Mizu at 1:32 PM on December 3, 2011

If it's not a combination bridal shower/bachelorette party, the bride won't expect gifts at all at the bachelorette party; for mine friends just pitched in to buy me a drink and dinner. Any gifts were at the bridal shower.

I got very practical (serving platter, curtain topper from my registry) gifts from my best friend and even though they weren't personal in a particular way I still remember them fondly just because of who got them for me.
posted by ejaned8 at 1:49 PM on December 3, 2011

Well, you couldn't get these shipped in time, but for future reference, I thinare really sweet and thoughtful.  Perhaps you could find something similar locally?  Maybe a Christian store will have some pillowcases embroidered with that first Corinthians quote you see everywhere?  

Or you could get one of those silver compact mirrors from Everything Remembered (or whichever place at your local mall sells such things) and have something memorable engraved on it.  Perhaps a part of her wedding vows, if you know them?  

1. Special pillowcases. Personally, I'm partial to these thought bubble pillowcases but they wouldn't arrive in time. You may be able to pick some up and take them to a seamstress to get them quickly customized with a lovely quote of some sort.

2. Something that you get engraved from Things Remembered or whichever store in your area sells such things.  I love the silver compact mirrors. You could have it say "and they lived happily ever after" or perhaps some part of her vows / wedding scripture, if you know them.  

3. One of those photo collages spelling out her new last name (if she's taking it) or the date of their wedding. See this for reference, although you might be able to put together something on your own and have it printed out / framed if you got right on it. 

4:  Search for wedding gifts in the etsy housewares section for other ideas. 
posted by diamondsky at 2:00 PM on December 3, 2011

(Clearly a formatting fail. Sorry.)
posted by diamondsky at 2:01 PM on December 3, 2011

I also thought of nicely bound books, like jabes. I thought of Great Expectations with a heartfelt note about how you have great expectations for her new life..yadda yadda.
posted by quodlibet at 2:06 PM on December 3, 2011

A nice looking notebook/journal that matches her kitchen to use as a cooking notebook - this will also go with the cooking class, she can use it to take notes. I have one, and it's great for writing down recipes I've invented, tips, ideas, and I also get friends to write their best recipes in it too. Get her a nice pen to go with it too, so the set will look nice on display in the kitchen, and will always be on hand
posted by 5_13_23_42_69_666 at 2:30 PM on December 3, 2011 [1 favorite]

Is she going on a honeymoon? I got a friend several beach-y reading books, plus a notebook to journal in.

Maybe a nice copy of Ovid's Metamorphoses? Sexy and classical.
posted by momus_window at 2:31 PM on December 3, 2011

Knives and scissors are traditionally considered bad luck and gifts.

I was always taught that one cancels out the bad luck by taping a penny to the knife (although googling suggests that some people believe instead that the recipient is supposed to pay a penny to the giver, so ymmv). Anyway, I do think something kitchen-y would be appreciated and would fit with the theme of the party. Go wander around a Williams Sonoma or similar and find something nice.
posted by naoko at 4:47 PM on December 3, 2011

Maybe make your own Bridal Survival Kit based on this one? You just need a cute box, some tissue paper, and assorted cute pampering things.
posted by snickerdoodle at 5:56 PM on December 3, 2011 [1 favorite]

You don't mention a budget...

But what about this nice clutch from Kate Spade that looks like literature (Emma, Austen) but functions as an accessory?
posted by cior at 10:02 AM on December 4, 2011