There are __ types of people

June 19, 2005 9:25 PM

What movies or books have lines that begin, "There are __ types of people in this world..."

I'm a fan of template jokes: lightbulbs, two cows, guys with no arms or legs. But I want to find more "two types of people" lines. I know the binary one, the "can't count" one...but I especially want ones with known contexts.

Shining example: in The Manchurian Candidate, Raymond's wife walks into the kitchen and turns on the TV. Raymond says, "There are two kinds of people in this world: Those that enter a room and turn the television set on, and those that enter a room and turn the television set off."

It's not just clever ones I'm after; I want every quote possible. Incidentally, the above quote may derive from this quote.

posted by NickDouglas to grab bag (28 comments total)

"There are two types of people in this world: those who like Neil Diamond, and those who don't."
- BOB WILEY (Bill Murray) in What About Bob? (1991)
posted by null terminated at 9:39 PM on June 19, 2005

"There are two types of people in this world, good and bad. The good sleep better,
but the bad seem to enjoy the waking hours much more." - Woody Allen

[that and Bill Murray are all I got out of a few minutes of googlin']
posted by falconred at 9:40 PM on June 19, 2005

"There are two types of people in the world - those with a gun, and those who dig. Now dig!" -- The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly
posted by null terminated at 9:41 PM on June 19, 2005

Mitch: You know there are two types of people in this world: Those who get stomped on and those who do the stomping.
Kathy: Where did you hear that?
Mitch: Oh, that famous guy said it. What was his name? ...Jesus!

Dirty Work (1998)
posted by null terminated at 9:42 PM on June 19, 2005

Marvin: This country is divided into two types of people. Ford People and Chevy People. - Northfork (2003)
posted by null terminated at 9:43 PM on June 19, 2005

Well, here are a few:

"There are two kinds of people: those who say to God, "Thy will be done," and those to whom God says, "All right, then, have it your way." - C.S. Lewis

"There are two kinds of people, those who finish what they start and so on." - Robert Byrne

"There are two kinds of people in the world, those who believe there are two kinds of people in the world and those who don't." - Robert Benchley (Tom Robbins wrote something quite similar, much later)

"There are only two kinds of people who are really fascinating: people who know absolutely everything, and people who know absolutely nothing." - Oscar Wilde

My favorite "kinds of people" quotation is from an unknown source: "There are three kinds of people in this world: those who can count, and those who can't."
posted by cerebus19 at 9:44 PM on June 19, 2005 [1 favorite has favorites]

Al Pacino to Chris O'Donnell in "Scent of a Woman" : There's two types of people, one who stand up to face the bullets and another who run for covers.....Covers is the better option.
posted by null terminated at 9:46 PM on June 19, 2005

You see, there are three types of people. Dicks, pussies and assholes. Pussies think everyone can get along. And Dicks just wanna fuck all the time without thinkin it through. Then you got your assholes, chuck. All the assholes want is to shit all over everything! So sometimes pussies get mad at dicks once and a while, because pussies get fucked by dicks. But dicks also fuck assholes, chuck, and if they didn't, you know what you'd get? You'd get your dick and your pussy all covered in shit!Team America
posted by null terminated at 9:49 PM on June 19, 2005

There's two kinds of people, them goin' somewhere and them goin' nowhere. And's that what's true. -- Paint Your Wagon

There are two kinds of people in Alaska: those who were born here and those who come here to escape something. I wasn't born here. -- Insomnia

There are two kinds of evil people in this world. Those who do evil things and those who see evil things and don't try to stop it. -- Mean Girls

This country is divided into two types of people. Ford People and Chevy People. -- Northfork

There are two kinds of people in this country, the doomed and the screwheads. -- Where the Buffalo Roam

I guess there's just two kinds of people, Miss Sandstone: MY kind of people, and assholes. -- Pink Flamingoes

There are two kinds of people in this world, and you ain't one of 'em! -- Rhinestone

-- stolen from the IMDB
posted by dobbs at 9:51 PM on June 19, 2005

(my answers were all copied and pasted as well)
posted by null terminated at 9:58 PM on June 19, 2005

Technology is dominated by two types of people: those who understand what they do not manage, and those who manage what they do not understand.
---Putt's Law

There are two types of people--those who come into a room and say, 'Well, here I am!' and those who come in and say, 'Ah, there you are.'
---Frederick L Collins
posted by mmoncur at 10:30 PM on June 19, 2005

There are three kinds of people in the world: those that make things happen, those that watch things happen, and those that wonder what the hell happened.

There are three kinds of people in the world: those that can count and those that can't.

(Can't remember where I got these from)
posted by randomstriker at 10:37 PM on June 19, 2005

The Tom Robbins version referenced above was "... those who think there are only two kinds of people in the world and those who know better." From, I think, Still Life with Woodpecker (a distant 2nd possibilitiy is Jitterbug Perfume, but I'm about 95% certain it was Woodpecker).
posted by Tuwa at 11:08 PM on June 19, 2005

Well, there's the bit about Beatles people and Elvis people in Pulp Fiction, that's what came to my mind.

And there's the geeky version: "There are 10 types of people in the world, those who know binary, and those who don't."
posted by dagnyscott at 11:19 PM on June 19, 2005

There are two types of people in the world: People who divide the world up into two types of people, and people who don't. [source unknown... Steve Martin maybe?]
posted by matildaben at 11:34 PM on June 19, 2005

There's one from this series of poems...the poems had a frame story, where a cricket or some bug was typing poems, I think he was in love with a cat (Not "A Cricket in Times Square"). The poetry was lowercase because, the author explained, the cricket couldn't hold down the shift. Anyway, one poem explored the difference between people who could make the end of the world sound boring, and people who could discuss their latest grocery shopping trip and leave you speechless.

"and so on" is my favorite.
posted by NickDouglas at 11:42 PM on June 19, 2005

nickdouglas:

you are talking about don marquis' archy & mehitabel.
posted by dersins at 12:30 AM on June 20, 2005

There are only forty people in the world and five of them are hamburgers - Captain Beefheart
posted by Grangousier at 12:55 AM on June 20, 2005

"I feel that life is divided into the horrible and the miserable. That's the two categories. The horrible are like, I don't know, terminal cases, you know, and blind people, crippled. I don't know how they get through life. It's amazing to me. And the miserable is everyone else. So you should be thankful that you're miserable, because that's very lucky, to be miserable" - Woody Allen
posted by gfrobe at 1:40 AM on June 20, 2005

There are two types of people in this world: those who read the question, and those who give answers the questioner already says he knows. Twice...
posted by benzo8 at 2:09 AM on June 20, 2005

"Only two kinds of people are gonna stay on this beach: those that are already dead and those that are gonna die." -- The Longest Day, 1962
posted by planetkyoto at 5:36 AM on June 20, 2005

benzo8: Sorry about the repeats, I was trying to be helpful. You might try doing the same.
posted by null terminated at 6:24 AM on June 20, 2005

archy was actually a cockroach, not a cricket.
posted by matildaben at 8:04 AM on June 20, 2005

benzo8: Sorry about my last comment, I incorrectly thought you were talking about me. Even if you had been, I could have been more polite in my reply.
posted by null terminated at 8:44 AM on June 20, 2005

The Beatles/Elvis line dagnyscott referenced from Pulp Fiction comes from Mia, Uma Thurman's character. It's in the script, but didn't make it into the final film.

Now I'm gonna ask you a bunch of quick questions I've come up with that more of less tell me what kind of person I'm having dinner with. My theory is that when it comes to important subjects, there's only two ways a person can answer. For instance, there's two kinds of people in this world, Elvis people and Beatles people. Now Beatles people can like Elvis. And Elvis people can like the Beatles. But nobody likes them both equally. Somewhere you have to make a choice. And that choice tells me who you are.

Vincent, of course, is an Elvis person, and this is referenced a few minutes later (in a scene that wasn't cut from the final film) when they get to Jackrabbit Slim's and Mia says, "An Elvis man should love this."
posted by Acetylene at 9:35 AM on June 20, 2005

This doesn't quite fit the template, but my favourite is:

"All men are frauds. The only difference between them is that some admit it. I myself deny it." - H. L. Mencken
posted by emyd at 9:49 AM on June 20, 2005

In a slim novel called "How I Became Stupid" by a Frenchman, the protagonist often plays this game with his friends in which they try to name the great divisions in this world - people who do A and people who do B. Sorry I can't remember any of the examples right now & Amazon's 'search inside this book' doesn't work on this one. (It's in the early chapters.) I wouldn't have mentioned this book if you didn't say you were a completist.
posted by of strange foe at 10:23 AM on June 20, 2005

Tuco: "There are two kinds of people in the world, my friend: Those with a rope around the neck, and the people who have the job of doing the cutting." -The Good The Bad The Ugly
posted by furtive at 7:41 PM on June 20, 2005