I want to drop out of grad school and/or quit my job. Please convince me that everything will be okay if I do.
My job is with non-profit federal organization. I make pretty good money, especially for being so young (mid-20s) and only having a bachelor's degree. It offers me amazing benefits and a decent amount of vacation/personal time I'm unhappy there because I don't really like my co-workers and they don't really like me. One of them talks constantly and his voice is very loud. My boss won't let me wear headphones. It is a *major* source of stress for me. Also, I don't really like the work. I meet with dozens of people every week, trying to help them fix their problems, and it's really stressful and I bring home that stress with me. It makes me cranky and bitter and jaded. I really don't give a fuck anymore.
It seems silly to quit such a good job, though, especially since it gives me the freedom to do what I want to do outside of work, and the annoying co-worker is retiring a year from now. I think that I would enjoy my job much more if he weren't around, but I don't know if I can last that long.
Secondly, I'm in my second semester of grad school, getting my master's in a field related to my job. My job is paying for 80%. I don't enjoy the classes at all. They make me cranky and bitter and jaded as well because they focus on oppression and I'm just tired. I'm only getting my master's because it will give me a raise at work and I'll have more vacation/flex-time.
I'd up and quit my job, but I can't afford to. I have money in savings (about $4000), but I also have bills and I help support my family too.
What I really want to do is quit and do something like WWOOF or work in the food industry or do something that I really enjoy that doesn't involve constant interaction with strangers (I'm not a people person, try as I might to convince myself otherwise). It's hard to quit because I've worked really hard to get where I am and my parents have sacrificed a lot as well.
I feel that it would be selfish to quit and that I should just suck it up. I mean, not everyone can have their dream job, right? We can't be happy all of the time? Part of life is about making sacrifices for the greater good. At the same time, I feel that it's also sort of selfish of me to stay. I'm not passionate about my job and it shows. I'm sure it affects the people I work with.
I don't know if the problem is internal or external. Maybe I'd be happier in my job if I were happier in my life. But I am happy in my life! Outside of my job and school, things are great.
A part of me says "just stick with it two more years, finish your master's then quit!"
Another part of me wonders if I can make it that long. I burst into tears at work today and sat in my office and bawled.
Incidentally, I listened to this Freakonomics podcast
this weekend and it should've convinced me, but I just need help taking that first step. Or maybe I should just stick with it a little while longer?