I need medicinal booze.
September 30, 2011 4:37 PM   Subscribe

Stomach/GI problems for the past two weeks, now mostly gone except for persistent heartburn. What alcoholic beverage will cause me the least pain?

(Yes, I feel like an idiot for asking a drinking question, but desperate times = desperate measures.)

I had some stomach/GI problems starting about 2 weeks ago-I'll spare you the gory details, but I was pretty sure it was gastroenteritis of unknown origin. The worst of it ended after a few days and left me with an awful stomach--lots of nausea, heartburn, and general bloating/indigestion whenever I eat or drink anything.

OK. So mostly better except for the heartburn/bad stomach when I eat. But I'm going out with some friends tonight and I NEVER go out anymore and I really would like to try to have at least one alcoholic beverage (because I will be toddler-free for a few hours and dear gods that never happens!).

What can I try to drink that will do the least potential damage (at least in terms of short-term pain) to my stomach? Right now I'm thinking vodka and club soda. Yes, i know that drinking alcohol will mess up my stomach more, and yes, I will go see my doctor about the stomach thing next week if it's still going on. But for now: what might hurt the least? (Wine, beer, and liquor are all options.)
posted by devotion+doubt to Food & Drink (16 answers total) 2 users marked this as a favorite
 
Personally, a good IPA usually helps my stomach woes...
posted by kirst27 at 4:43 PM on September 30, 2011


A bitters, like Campari, and tonic?
posted by Rube R. Nekker at 4:46 PM on September 30, 2011 [1 favorite]


oh god, IPA coul dmake me give up alcohol. I don't know what it is.

I'd go with whatever you're normally comfortable drinking. vodka soda is a fine choice.
posted by GuyZero at 4:46 PM on September 30, 2011


My dad has GERD, and has to avoid beer. Wine he's semi-okay with, but he's a vodka tonic guy now.
posted by Specklet at 4:47 PM on September 30, 2011


With bloating as one of the symptoms, I'd be inclined to avoid anything with fizz. (I speak with the voice of uncomfortable experience.)
posted by ManyLeggedCreature at 4:49 PM on September 30, 2011


You could try a glass of red wine that's not too sour (like a good Rioja or something) and go easy on the bread/pasta/potatoes for the evening instead. Potatoes especially (+ especially if there are rich sauces too), I've found, but that's individual, of course.
posted by Namlit at 4:50 PM on September 30, 2011


Ouzo is traditionally considered a digestif.
posted by condour75 at 5:01 PM on September 30, 2011


I find that every form of alcohol exacerbates heartburn. I also find that milk (or cream) always soothes my heartburn almost entirely. Therefore White Russians.
posted by matlock expressway at 5:01 PM on September 30, 2011 [1 favorite]


I find hard liquor with a low- or no-sugar mixer works best for me. Vodka and soda sounds like a good call.

(Jagermeister soothes my stomach generally, although I don't much care for it, but it doesn't help acid reflux much.)
posted by restless_nomad at 5:02 PM on September 30, 2011


Best answer: Well, beer is notorious for causing heartburn because it is (1) carbonated and (2) alcoholic. Both those qualities make it really good at relaxing smooth muscle, like the muscle responsible for keeping the stomach contents from returning from whence they came... with a vengence.

Also drinking beer (opposed to wine) typically involves large volumes of potentially high calorie liquid, which the stomach siphons more slowly to the duodenum. Liquids high in fat can also sit in the stomach longer, so even though milk has a reputation of soothing heartburn, I'd opt for skim.

Also, possibly the most important factor, is the manliness factor. I assume you are a man because you are forsaking your health in better judgment to do something stupid and fun that you almost certainly know will come back to bite you. So you don't want to order something like Watermelon Julep then have to explain to a bunch of bros "oh I'm drinking this because of my weak stomach." If anything you want something that punches them in the face with it's independence and hunter-gathering-ness lest they even consider ragging on how a toddler has turned you, or you stomach, soft.

Keeping that in mind something like a bourbon and branch might be in order. On the surface it sounds like just watered down whiskey but branch water refers to mineral water that has long been added to whiskey by many aficionados to bring out subtle notes. It's totally manly, and as an added benefit, you can get it on the rocks in a rocks class and nurse that drink all night and still look classy.

Or, you know, take a bunch of tums before you go out and do a bunch of peppermint shots. Either way, good luck!
posted by midmarch snowman at 5:29 PM on September 30, 2011 [3 favorites]


Mint is good for indigestion. I sometimes take a shot of creme de menthe if I'm having problems with heartburn. Ginger is good for such things, too. Canadian Club and giinger ale? It's how I learned to drink!
posted by ThatCanadianGirl at 5:53 PM on September 30, 2011


Best answer: Bitters with soda. If it's a decent bar, they will have it. If you can stomach it, go for full-on bitters like a shot of Fernet Branca with a ginger back. Whiskey and ginger ale is also nice.

But really...bitters & soda. If you're at a decent bar with people who know a thing or two about alcohol, it will also make them love you. Bartenders love Fernet / bitters / amaro drinkers.
posted by lollipopgomez at 5:53 PM on September 30, 2011 [1 favorite]


Drink a glass of milk and take a Zantac first. And when my stomach was messed up from GERD, I drank white wine.
posted by radioamy at 8:35 AM on October 1, 2011


Anything with either peppermint in it or ginger would be my suggestions. Avoid Gin. If you where in Australia or Britain I'd suggest Stones Ginger Wine, I have found that one of the best cures for seasickness or nausea (and delicious), but I don't know if they sell that anywhere else in the world. Peppermint oil is great for soothing an icky digestive system so a nice peppermint schnapps or something with real peppermint in might be an idea.
posted by wwax at 9:05 AM on October 1, 2011


Response by poster: Thanks for the great suggestions! I went with vodka and soda last night and it seemed fine, but I could see where mint would be good too (hmm, mojito?).

I marked midmarch snowman's as the best answer because I'm a woman. :)
posted by devotion+doubt at 9:21 AM on October 1, 2011 [1 favorite]


I'm glad I could do my part to illustrate to irrelevance of gender stereotypes! ; )
posted by midmarch snowman at 12:19 PM on October 6, 2011


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