What To Marry People In?

August 27, 2011 10:22 AM

I'm performing a marriage ceremony in Los Angeles this September. What do I wear?

Everything about the wedding is non-traditional, though considerations are being made to keep parents happy. The wedding colors are black, gold, and dark green, and I know the groom and the groomsmen are wearing black suits, though again these are not normal people and there is definitely going to be a strong offbeat, non-christian (perhaps even slightly occult) vibe.

I know I am meant to stand out from the party a bit, and there is a lot of room to play with how this should be accomplished (early on they asked me if I could rock a peacock-feather cloak like the one in the Highlander movie, but this turned out to be impractical for a variety of reasons).

I'm really good at making things (props, accents, embellishments, vestments) but I can't sew my own clothes or anything. I thought it might be interesting to play up the "gold" aspect of the color scheme, but I'm having a hard time imagining what it would all look like, let alone finding a gold suit that doesn't make me look like I'm working a swingers club. I would like to at least have SOME ideas when I talk to the bride next week, so that she doesn't feel pressured to come up with everything on her own.

Here are some catches:

- I'm in NYC, wedding is in Los Angeles, and I will have little to no time after I arrive to shop or hunt for stuff.

- I'm 6'3, skinny, and have very long arms, which makes it difficult for me to wear any sort of jacket off-the-rack, and makes me a little hesitant about buying stuff online.

Anyhow, I'm just in brainstorming mode right now, so I figured I'd turn AskMe loose on it. Thanks!

posted by hermitosis to clothing, beauty, & fashion (16 answers total)

Black patent shoes, black hooded acolyte robes with gold/green trim and, for the ceremony, a black top hat.
posted by seanmpuckett at 10:24 AM on August 27, 2011

Have you asked them (beyond the peacock feather cloak)? I wouldn't think you'd want to try to upstage the bridge and groom.

I'd keep it simple, with one quirk. Like a top hat or something.
posted by quodlibet at 10:26 AM on August 27, 2011

Have you asked them (beyond the peacock feather cloak)? I wouldn't think you'd want to try to upstage the bridge and groom.

Again, they're the ones who suggested the peacock feathers. The groom asked me to figure out as many ideas on my own as I could before consulting the bride, so that she could choose from among them instead of having to make it up on her own.

Also I suspect a person of my height wearing a top hat would be like an already tall woman wearing heels on a blind date.
posted by hermitosis at 10:33 AM on August 27, 2011

If you can sew at all, how about making a green velvet stole (like ministers wear) with the outlines of symbols that are meaningful to the couple stitched in gold thread?

I think you'd want to wear this over a black shirt and pants to keep from looking play-minister-ish.
posted by lakeroon at 10:44 AM on August 27, 2011

Well, you could check out Offbeat Bride and look through the real weddings and take some suggestions from the groom, I suppose.
posted by quodlibet at 10:44 AM on August 27, 2011

Also I suspect a person of my height wearing a top hat would be like an already tall woman wearing heels on a blind date.

Oh not at all! From your description, this wedding is already plenty quirky. Use your height as a prop; wear a top hat! Hell, add some platform shoes and a monocle.
posted by ellenaim at 10:45 AM on August 27, 2011 [2 favorites]

Personally, I would go for a black suit, and a gold vest and tie. Another option, though not cheap, is you can find out of the ordinary top hats here (though they take a bit of time to complete the order.)
posted by gudrun at 11:29 AM on August 27, 2011

The wedding colors are black, gold, and dark green, and I know the groom and the groomsmen are wearing black suits, though again these are not normal people and there is definitely going to be a strong offbeat, non-christian (perhaps even slightly occult) vibe.

I'd say, take it toward overdone Victorian. Think Dickens, although maybe with a striped ascot instead of a tie to keep it from seeming too undertaker-ish. There are plenty of ways you can play with that kind of look to make it more offbeat if you want to go that way.

Do you shopping now in NYC where there will be plenty of shops to look around in, and then ship your clothes to LA via FedEx or something to avoid having to pay airline fees for them.

Alternatively, my first thought was "well, obviously you should wear a utilikilt", although what else that outfit includes, I have no idea.
posted by hippybear at 11:43 AM on August 27, 2011 [1 favorite]

I would suggest getting some nice gold lame fabric (or a gold scarf), and pinning it to your shoulder in the style of a Fly Plaid. If you could also get a gold kilt that would be totally awesome.

More simply, a nice gold sash over a black suit could be something that stands out without being too tricky.
posted by that girl at 11:45 AM on August 27, 2011

Epanokamelavkion. It's a timeless look and you'll have so much fun teaching wedding guests the new word of the day.
posted by roger ackroyd at 12:23 PM on August 27, 2011

The groomsmen will be wearing black, so presumably the bridesmaids will be wearing green and gold? making black the male color and green-gold the female color for the purposes of the wedding color scheme?

You could wear black pants and black shirt to match what the groomsmen are wearing, and vest that's mostly black on one side and green-gold-yellow green on the other, with a patchwork pattern that interlaces the two colors in the middle, representing your role in the ceremony, combining the two sexes.

You can sew pieces of fabric with the corresponding colors over an existing vest that fits (thrift-store or something), you don't have to make it yourself from scratch. For the interlace pattern, think tendrily. Green's a plant color, and I think you should at least make nod to that. The ideas of growth and joining make sense here. You can cheat a bit (or a lot) by using fabric swatches with patterns that already incorporate the three colors in varying degrees.

You could think in terms of black and green joining and producing gold flowers. This will probably already be present in floral patterns you might use. You can use it.

In a variant of this, you could wear a black shirt and green pants with the same vest. (I don't think the reverse would work as well, but I can't really explain why.)
posted by nangar at 1:03 PM on August 27, 2011

The best officiant outfit I've seen definitely worked in the colors of both parties, so if groomsmen are wearing black I really like the idea of combining a black suit with a colorful green and gold shirt/vest/cummerbund/something.

I like the tophat idea, too - you should stand out, and I think it'd make a nice focal point to have your height between the two parties.
posted by ldthomps at 1:42 PM on August 27, 2011

So far my favorite answer is the fly plaid, because the groom is actually of Scottish descent. Still keeping an open mind though, so keep 'em rolling!
posted by hermitosis at 2:04 PM on August 27, 2011

Green underkimono, with black-and-gold outer kimono or different black-and-gold outer kimono

Black judicial robe

Green choir robe

Gold nehru tunic

Green tuxedo vest

Gold tuxedo vest

Gold-and-black tuxedo vest
posted by foursentences at 7:00 PM on August 27, 2011

Dude, you own that awesome "tux jacket with embellishments on the shoulders" thingie. I've seen it. It rules. There's no way that thing will fade into the background—in a good way.

Rock it with a tasteful gold cummerbund. Maybe even the plaid.
posted by functionequalsform at 7:47 PM on August 27, 2011

Draw a line through Saruman (Lord of the Rings), Jean-Baptiste Emmanuel Zorg (The Fifth Element) and Carter Burke (Aliens). You want to be somewhere along that line. Now sure, these guys are all villains, but they are villains of the smooth talking, classically dressed variety (for values of classically dressed equal to not of this Earth).

It goes without saying that you shouldn't try to infect the wedding party with alien larva, raise up an army of orcs or hire a band of mercenaries to assassinate them before they arrive.
posted by Kid Charlemagne at 11:39 PM on August 27, 2011