An I being petty?
August 17, 2011 2:20 AM Subscribe
Am I being petty about a gift from a close friend?
posted by Mintyblonde to Human Relations (30 answers total) 1 user marked this as a favorite
I am probably being petty but this recent experience is still bugging me and I’d like a neutral opinion(s). So, it was my birthday a few months ago and one of my best friends quite nicely advises me that he’s sending me a present – we live in different towns and I am in almost daily e-mail contact with him. I work full time, live alone and have a commute to get to work, therefore I wasn’t available to sign for the present when it arrived. To complicate matters the parcel wasn’t held at my local post office (it was held on an industrial estate on the other side of the big city I live in) and they would only re-schedule delivery for Monday – Friday between hours I was still at work, or travelling to and from work. After a particularly stressful few weeks at work the existence of the parcel slipped my mind and it was recalled back to the supplier, my friend was refunded his costs, prior to this however he did e-mail me to say this was going to happen and I suggested he re-send it to my work address so I would get it – to this I was advised that I was being a ‘cheeky bastard’ and I’ve heard nothing further matter since, and no replacement present or explanation has arrived.
I really don’t understand this attitude, particularly the last comment about being ‘cheeky’. Sure it was very nice of him to send me something for my birthday (which we frequently do amongst my circle of close friends) and I don’t wish to sound ungrateful, but this attitude strikes me as ridiculous. Special bonus point which may sound petty but I think it also bears on things – it was said friends 40th birthday earlier in the year and I shelled out £1,000+ to help celebrate his birthday in foreign climes, obviously this wasn’t completely altruistic as I enjoyed the holiday as well so I wasn’t exactly being a martyr, but the point still stands? No? For what its worth we’ve been in regular contact since and our friendship or frequency of communication hasn’t altered in anyway so I’m 99% sure it’s not as if I have offended my friend in any other way to prompt this reaction.
Should I broach this with my friend and ask what’s the deal with this reaction? Should I just let it go? It’s not about the present per se (I’m 99% sure it was a book that would have cost about £40, no small gift but something easily available through Amazon) it’s the attitude which still really grates on me. Thanks in advance fellow me-fites for your reflections and advice on this insignificant matter…