How do I quit my job?
July 16, 2011 10:29 AM Subscribe
I am terrible at quitting jobs. Please walk me through how I can actually quit, frame my quitting, and how to act in the meantime.
posted by anonymous to work & money (16 answers total) 6 users marked this as a favorite
I have problems ending things. In the past, big/justifiable excuses (going back to school) were helpful. In this case I'm quitting because I don't like it generally and it isn't flexible enough for me as a parent. We can get by on 1 income for the time being, so this is a good decision for me. I've only been in this job for a year.
I am now speculating about the outcomes of my quitting. I realize that I don't really know how people will react and I have no control over how people will react. I also realize that worrying about their reactions does nothing for me. Nonetheless...
I already set the stage with my boss. I told her that my special needs child is going to need me more as the new school year begins and I asked for greater flexibility to come in late. I offered to take a paycut. Nothing came of this discussion in the past few months. I tried to go through HR as well and in this office, work/life balance/flexibility is determined by individual bosses. (But I don't like it anyway...)
My plan is to tell them about 3 weeks before school starts that "Upon weighing all the options, we decided that it'd be best for one of us to be a stay-at-home parent for the time being" and remind my boss individually that my child has special needs. (There is a remote possibility that my trying to quit might push them into trying to make things more flexible for me, but I'll cross that bridge if it comes.)
However, in the past, I've been very hesitant to tell coworkers that my child is special needs.
Question 1: If my official reason for leaving is to be a stay-at-home parent and only my boss knows about my child being special needs, how do I deal with the possible questions/gossip like "But your child has been fine in daycare for years... Why are you leaving the workforce now?" Or maybe do I say "Yes, but Child has some special needs that mean that having more one-on-one attention is important right now." and leave it at that? (I think that with this sort of "she's making a good/right decision" framing, it might make things less bumpy overall.)
I've been working really hard to tie up all loose ends now. I'm not going to be totally screwing them in terms of work, but others will have to take on a greater load in my absence.
(In the meantime, I'm tying up loose ends, we're switch to other parent's health insurance, I'm spending all my pre-tax health savings, I'm slowly bringing personal items home from work, etc. -- just to be on the safe side, I want to have almost all of that tidied up before I give my notice just in case I'm asked to leave that day. (Which would suck financially because we prepay daycare monthly.))
The only worry I have on this front is that I feel that people may be upset about the time/energy that they put into training me. Again, I don't really know what people will think, but I am worried about this.
I HATE those weeks that everyone knows that you're leaving. I hate knowing that, quite possibly, people are gossiping about your exit.
Question 2: How can I make those 2 or 3 weeks after everyone knows that I'm leaving less awkward?