Seeking good book for goal-setting in relationships.

May 9, 2011 4:50 PM

My ladyfan and I are looking for recommendations for books that may help us move our relationship forward, especially ones with a focus on discussing, setting, and working on goals together.

So, yes, we would like to move our relationship into the future, however neither of us are very good at setting and achieving goals individually, so setting goals as a couple tends to ... not work out, really. As such, we'd like a book that we can read and work through together, preferably one with plenty of exercises, examples, and activity suggestions.

posted by The Great Big Mulp to human relations (5 answers total)

Hm. This question is a little ambiguous. Are you asking about goals as in relationship goals (moving in together, getting married, having a baby, raising said child to adulthood well) or as in other kinds of jointly-held goals (starting your own business, rebuilding a car together, building a garden from scratch)?
posted by Sublimity at 4:46 AM on May 10, 2011

The financial advice book, "Total Money Makeover" is not everyone's cup of tea, but it's good about giving you a framework for setting goals and talking things out as a couple. Granted, it's budget focused, but being open and honest about money makes planning and working towards other goals a heckuva lot easier IMO.
posted by emjay at 8:18 AM on May 10, 2011

Sublimity: Both relationship and jointly held goals, really, I suppose. Everything from planning and saving for a vacation or car to completing art projects together to looking at where we would like to be in five years and what steps we can take towards that. Which, I suppose, is a bit ambiguous.
posted by The Great Big Mulp at 10:01 AM on May 10, 2011

Mulp's Ladyfan here, thought I'd jump in here to help clarify if I may.

Books about relationship based goals or jointly-held are fine as long as the book includes activities we can do together and a basic goal setting formula that we can use in others areas of our lives. We are looking for something that will help us understand the basics for building a stable future.

We don't plan on having any kids or starting a business together but maintaining a home together and keeping it paid for is more what we are looking for.

I hope this was helpful.
posted by SheMulp AKA Plus 1 at 5:06 PM on May 10, 2011

Is this It's Your Money workbook the kind of thing you're looking for?

If so:

My self-appointed role here on AskMe is to encourage people to use their libraries. So, I would recommend a trip to the library to check out books like that. (The call number for It's Your Money is 332.024 M124i .) Browse the shelf (and the online catalog, too!) and borrow anything that looks interesting. If you find one or two you especially like, you can buy them if you want to.
posted by kristi at 1:56 PM on May 11, 2011