How do I work out what to write about?

April 4, 2011 2:48 AM

I’m a talented hack who can’t think of a long-term personal writing project. Any ideas for how I work this out?

Rambling version, and apologies for occasional immodesty here: I’m a freelance writer. I specialise in educational materials for schools and colleges, but I’ve also written across a range of other non-fiction formats as well. I’ve done this for over 15 years and I’m good at it. Clients think of me as both creative and reliable, my resources go down well with teachers and students and I’ve got the odd industry award under my belt.

I’m a hack. I’m lucky to come with the intellectual horsepower to get to grips with most subjects and write well about most things, which is a lot of my appeal to clients. This keeps my professional life interesting and busy enough for me to earn a good living. I work from home and I like it that way. It’s not often fulfilling, though, and I want to start an independent project that will stretch me and allow me to use what talents I have to write about something I’m interested in or care about. This would not be an educational project in the stuff-for-schools sense.

And here’s the problem: I’ve no idea what this might be. There are lots of things I’m interested in or which I’ve an abiding curiosity about, but nothing that’s ever leapt out as a subject about which I really want to write.

Careers counselling background: I got thoroughly tested a few years ago and got told that I’m potentially good at anything. I don’t have any stand-out strengths in numeracy, verbal reasoning etc. because I’m at or near the top of the scale in all of them, which doesn’t exactly narrow down my options. For what it’s worth, my IQ is apparently around the 140 mark as measured in different ways and on different occasions, though I know that’s a limited way of thinking about intelligence or ability.

As further background, I’m hopeless at occupying myself unless it’s with a book. Or browsing the internet. For all there are things I could do for the fun of it, I never actually seem to. I’m extremely introverted so I’m happy just diddling around in my own head for long periods and I think this is part of the reason. I do tend to be motivated by the functional: I’m good at projects around the house and I’ll have a go at most things as long as there’s a reason. I’m fascinated by ideas, though, and do see myself as a sort of on-going experiment when it comes to how I should live a good, simple life.

I turned 40 recently and over a few days of navel-gazing I came across the interesting thought here on AskMe that at 40, why not identify what I could be an expert at by the time I’m 50? Within the confines of it being something I write about, I suppose that’s one dimension of what I’m looking for here.

I’m not after a purpose in life or to find the career I love. I know instinctively what those are: father and husband, and writer. But I do want to feel, internally, that I’m using my talents to achieve something that I’m really proud of for my sake, and not just because I got a gold plaque for a client. I'm not after fame or riches. You could say I'm stuck with a very real feeling that someone’s given me a huge gun but I’ve no idea what to aim and fire it at. At the moment, other people pick my targets. But if I could do this for myself, I'd be able to make my own unique contribution to the world (although I’m not trying to be self-aggrandising here).

I’ve deliberately not said what I’m interested in as I don’t want suggestions so much as mental tools I could use to find the answers for myself. Let’s assume Steve Pavlina’s find-your-life’s-purpose-in-20-minutes-or-so exercise did nothing.

Any ideas how I do this? In a week's time I've got a fortnight's family holiday somewhere nicely quiet and remote, so I'll have time to think!

posted by dowcrag to work & money (13 answers total)

How about you write FPPs on the blue?
posted by hal_c_on at 3:09 AM on April 4, 2011 [1 favorite]

I'm not gonna provide a direct answer here, but I think you're afraid of trying your hand at something because of the chance it won't measure up to your own ideals of your talent and intellect. I think it's very telling that you spend 3/4s of this post talking about how smart and capable you are, rather than what you want to do and why you haven't done it already.

Fear of failure is common, especially as we get older and therefore more skilled in the things we actually spend our time doing. But anyone who's been a freelance writer for as long as you should know that talent amounts to very little and hard work amounts to a lot.

If you want to do something you're proud of, start volunteering. Get down to the local school or community college and start teaching some other people/children the skills that have won you awards and accolades from clients. There is nothing on this earth more satisfying than empowering people; that would be an easy way to do it.

But no offense, I don't think you're interesting in doing something you can be proud of, so much as something else you can tell people you are fabulous at. Well, the bad news is there's always gonna be lots more people more fabulous at whatever than you.

Rather than talking or thinking about how great you could be at anything, use the things you are great at to help other people. You can learn so much doing that, but people in my experience rarely give it the due it deserves.
posted by smoke at 3:26 AM on April 4, 2011 [1 favorite]

Smoke, I do have a fear of failure and I've invested a lot of time and effort in overcoming that - it can be genuine and crippling at times. I'm sorry if I've come across as full of myself here. I thought I'd been clear that I'm not asking this so that I can brag about it afterwards. Quite the opposite. But I included that information as more than one psychologist has identified it as pertinent to unlocking where I'm currently stuck.

I'm deliberately asking here, on MeFi, using an internet name that allows me to be anonymous to people who know me in real life, and to whom I don't brag. I'm internally motivated and want something where I can perhaps live up to my own standards in the long run.
posted by dowcrag at 3:54 AM on April 4, 2011

Further background: I already do volunteer and share my skills. But that's not what I'm asking here. I'm asking specifically about identifying a WRITING PROJECT.
posted by dowcrag at 3:56 AM on April 4, 2011

So, what would constitute failure in a project like this? The inability to write something? Other peoples' disinterest in publishing it? The public's lack of financial support for your endeavours? Or is it even that the.subsequent Oprah book tour would keep you away from your family?

Be specific in your response and flesh out the why whatever point of failure is so crippling.
posted by Nanukthedog at 4:10 AM on April 4, 2011

Nanukthedog:

I suppose you could say that while I come up with original ideas for teaching resources, I'm using them as a vehicle for getting established points across. So instead I'd like to focus on something that eventually might allow me to say something that's uniquely new, rather than repackaging ideas in new ways, even if it's just to myself. If I'd listened internally a bit more instead of to my father I'd have been a research physicist somewhere. That's not a option now but I suppose what I want to do is in the same spirit. Perhaps the failure issue is that I'm too intimidated by other authors, who can make me put a book down for a moment because they've hit me with something truly thought-provoking, and I don't think that I'm capable of the same. That's one way of describing things, but I'd want to add the caveat that it's as much about the process of writing, so that I'm provoking myself, as much as doing so for others, if that makes sense. Perhaps I just need to turn self-reflection into a private project. And yes, perhaps I could start by reflecting on this post.
posted by dowcrag at 4:33 AM on April 4, 2011

Creating something "uniquely new" may be setting the bar far too high — I bet most of those books you can't put down are actually repackagings too, just novel and surprising ones. I think it's a false dichotomy to imagine that you have to choose between dutifully following client instructions vs. coming up with a stunningly original contribution, as a top research physicist might. The middle ground is to come up with your own interesting repackaging of a topic or idea that you're already interested in. Indeed, the "interesting repackaging" will probably happen naturally, if you start looking into a topic for the fun of it, instead of on someone else's orders.

Just a thought that may make the selection process a bit easier...!
posted by oliverburkeman at 5:27 AM on April 4, 2011

In a week's time I've got a fortnight's family holiday somewhere nicely quiet and remote, so I'll have time to think!

Here's how I'd think this through - what manner of thing would I like to read, that does not currently exist? The great pleasure of personal creation is that you're not accountable to anyone's preferences but your own - can you think of a book, story, non-fiction text or even something else, which would be your favourite book if only someone had ever written it?
posted by piato at 6:09 AM on April 4, 2011 [1 favorite]

Here's something that I do, and maybe it would have some appeal to you as well.

I have a young daughter. I take interesting questions I see in AskMe and I write answers for her should she ever ask a similar question. It causes me to think about myself and about her, about who we both are, and who we might be in the future. It causes me to think about our times, and the context in which the question is asked. I pick things I can answer confidently, but more often than not, I try to pick questions that require me to think outside myself and my own experience. In doing so, the hope is to lay myself open for her. And through the answers and advice, to let her know who I was. And why. Of course it ends up being somewhat autobiographical, but the idea is to speak to the future her. To share my fears, and hopes, and dreams for what her life may be like for her. To bring my mistakes into focus for her, so that when she struggles, she might struggle more efficiently, and where I have gained some useful understanding, she might be able to leverage that for herself. I also end up getting to know better the person I have become and how to improve upon that while she is still young and there is time to be different, and to make a difference.

I am an older parent, so I may be gone by the time her life would cause her to ask many of the questions that turn up here. This is both a motivator, and an attempt to live just a little bit longer in her life than I otherwise might.
posted by nickjadlowe at 7:10 AM on April 4, 2011 [2 favorites]

I suppose you could say that while I come up with original ideas for teaching resources, I'm using them as a vehicle for getting established points across. So instead I'd like to focus on something that eventually might allow me to say something that's uniquely new, rather than repackaging ideas in new ways, even if it's just to myself.

Write something uniquely new about being a talented hack. The old cliche is "write what you know" and you obviously know a lot about how to be a successful writer of teaching resources. It could be part memoir, part how-to, and part inspiration/encouragement for other aspiring writers.
posted by amyms at 8:09 AM on April 4, 2011

Do you know that AA Milne poem about the shipwrecked sailor who has so many things to do that he can't decide between them and ends up doing none of them? (Just found it here: http://ahistoricality.blogspot.com/2005/08/thursday-verses-old-sailor.html ). The point is that he would have been better off if he'd done *any* of them than he was being riven by indecision.

I am a novelist and journalist. I've just delivered my third book to my publisher. So I'm not saying this from a position of no knowledge about how hard it is to get started and to keep writing.

This is what to do. Write anything. Buy a book of writing prompts (I recommend "A Writer's Book of Days" to my students) and work through them, one a day, for the next year. You will start to see some themes emerging of things you keep on writing about. Concentrate on them.

Writing fiction is a process dependent on the subconscious and there's no way to work out what it wants to write about other than to just do a lot of writing: imperfect, stupid, totally derivative writing. You want to make a lot of 'shitty first drafts' [also read Bird by Bird by Anne Lamott, a genius at explaining this]. I can guarantee you that your first efforts - probably your first two or three years of efforts - will *not* be uniquely new.

Also, when you get a new note book, rip out the first few pages, stamp on it, get dirt on the edges. This is an exercise an art-teacher friend of mine makes her students do with their sketchbooks. It is to say: this sketchbook is not holy. It is not being created to be shown in the Louvre. It is a place of work and practise, where a lot of mistakes will be made.

Wondering 'what to write about' is like wondering what you ought to dream about tonight. Just start writing. You'll find out.
posted by acalthla at 8:42 AM on April 4, 2011 [11 favorites]

I'll call the Seth Godin route - start a blog. Write short posts about something you know intimately well. You've freelanced for 15 years and you're still making it? WOW. Make some rules if you like: no posts over 500 words, must be universally helpful, etc.

The long-term part comes when you make these into a best-selling book. Send me a percentage or two of the proceeds :)
posted by chrisinseoul at 9:13 AM on April 4, 2011

This question puts me in mind of Murakami's After the Quake and Orleans' The Orchid Thief -- investigative writing projects fueled by personal interest and passion. If these works are the kind of project you have in mind, you'll need to tune in to the unanswered questions and un-mined topics in your own life.

When you read someone else's book and are struck by those new insights, maybe that's the start of a line of inquiry to follow. Or, before you start reading a book, ask yourself what you hope to get out of it. If the book doesn't deliver, maybe you can write one that does. Or, think about what subjects you'd like to take a class on -- maybe that's because no book exists on that topic.

On a more personal and meta level, you could investigate research physicists and related topics. Or interview those thought-provoking authors on the nature of insight and idea-generation.
posted by xo at 9:14 AM on April 4, 2011 [3 favorites]