Facebook Novice: Why is my long-lost ex contacting me now?
January 6, 2011 8:48 PM Subscribe
I am just wondering why would an ex ask to befriend you when you haven't spoken in over 10 years? This happened to me today and I am confused.
posted by anonymous to human relations (37 answers total) 4 users marked this as a favorite
A little background: This was not just an ex, this was "the one who got away." My first love I guess. I was immature and he moved on and I didn't think I would ever hear from him again. I think I've thought about him everyday for the past 12 years, even as I've moved on and dated other people and yes I know that's unhealthy but I just couldn't get over him. Anyway, just as I'm trying to come to grips with the idea that I will never hear from or see him again (why would I?), that I will never know--and can never know because it's just better for me emotionally if I don't--if he married and had kids and whatnot, I get an e-mail saying he wants to be my friend on Facebook. I honestly figured maybe he had forgotten I even existed. I guess for the average person this kind of thing is par for the course, but for me, just knowing what kind of indebible impression he made on my life, it was like a miracle seeing his name in my e-mail. It just was.
So anyway, I am not a Facebook person, I literally never go on there. I opened an account a while back just because my friends asked me to, but I never check it and don't really get why I should. My inclination is to ignore his request like I've done others', but I'm just trying to reconcile this whole ordeal in my mind. In other words, I'm trying to come up with a possible explanation without having to directly ask him. I just want to know what compels someone to look up and befreind on FB an ex from years ago, especially it that someone has moved on romantically and whatnot? What is the motive? Again, we are not friends, not even acquaintances and we didn't end on the best of terms, so I'm just baffled. Have you ever called up one of your exes just because? What was your aim? What was your angle?
Just curuios. Thanks for any insight.