January 2, 2011 6:23 AM Subscribe
I believe my boyfriend may be entering in to an emotional affair with a former coworker via facebook. How do i bring this up without seeming untrusting when nothing physical has happened (yet?)
posted by anonymous to Human Relations (37 answers total) 4 users marked this as a favorite
We've been together for 3 years, in our late 20's. they worked together before we met. They were mild acquaintances while colleagues, and to my knowledge never really spent significant time together.
Through the wonders of social media (facebook and other sites) they have reconnected and this girl just keeps popping up all over his shit. a status like here, shared comments about a post there. he lists me as his girlfriend and references me all the time, but well, you know how it goes.
why i hope you don't think i'm a stalker paranoid crazy girl:
- i do not read his email or snoop, this is all public.
- he mentions her by name, fondly, whenever she comments on something (e.g. 'oh, claire, she liked my status, you would really like claire, she's awesome), he NEVER does this about any other girls or facebook activity - i've never asked about her, he just volunteers it.
- he has been promiscuous on-line in the past while single, so he knows the in's and out's of hooking up online and how to e-seduce.
- i've busted him flirting with strangers on line while with me
- he has more female friends than male
- he got drunk and kissed a girl at a party while we were dating
while the above nonsense is in out past and we've moved on (i think?), i can't help but get nervous when i see a female enter his life, especially with all the horror stories about facebook lost loves. i trust him 99%, it's things like this and the above behavior that just nag nag nag at me.
So, larger question is am i bound to not trust this guy? things like this just EAT AWAY at me. how do i not freak out about this?