Can you help me create the definitive Columbo drinking game?

August 21, 2010 4:40 PM

Can you help me create the definitive Columbo drinking game?

I've been wanting to make up a drinking game to the "Columbo" tv series for ages. I've searched online for one, and the best so far has been on this website. There are a few others available of varying quality. Are there any suggestions you can make which would make a "Columo" drinking game fun and enhance the list? As with any good drinking games of this nature it's necessary to strike a balance between having enough rules to keep things interesting but not so many it becomes too convoluted to follow. Here's the list I have so far, any suggestions to improve it? By the way if you haven't ever watch Columbo you don't know what you're missing, it's immense.

Drink...

1. Every time Columbo says "just one more thing..."

2. Every time he says "Excuse me"

3. Three times every time he uses his dog in the investigation.

4. Every time someone comments on his car.

5. Every time someone comments on his clothes.

6. Every time he looks astounded by some "new" piece of technology, like the VCR.

7. Every time he eats or asks for food.

8. Every time someone catches him inside their house without their knowledge.

- Twice if he falls asleep in the suspect's apartment.

9. Every time he mentions his wife.

- Twice if he gets an autograph/souveneir for her.

10. Every time he wants to take up the profession of the person he's talking to.

- Twice if he gives some lame excuse why he HASN'T taken up the profession, like "...but my thumbs are too big".

11. Every time he uses the phrase "just tying up loose ends"

12. Every time he refers to the "boys downtown" as being "real strict".

13. Every time he uses the phrase "just a formality".

14. Every time he uses the phrase "sorry to bother you".

15. Every time he puts a cigar in his mouth.

16. Every time he takes off his trench coat (it still counts if it's a new one).

17. Every time he rubs his bottom eyelid with his index finger.

18. Every time another policeman/detective working on the case gives a totally incorrect assessment of the crime.

19. Every time he uses the phone at someone else's house/office.

20. Every time the criminal offers an explanation Columbo knows is wrong

posted by Spamfactor to sports, hobbies, & recreation (9 answers total)

Before the first commercial break, everyone will have had 20 drinks, and will no longer be able to keep up with a 20-item list.
posted by Houstonian at 5:05 PM on August 21, 2010 [1 favorite]

Admittedly if you were sticking to the list given above it wouldn't be wise to try it with tequila shots or other spirits. It would work well with beer or mixed drinks though. I'm not suggesting this list needs to be expanded, just improved or refined.
posted by Spamfactor at 5:09 PM on August 21, 2010

I think it would be a simpler, and more fun, game if you pared the list down to just Columbo's own personality quirks. You don't need the things about the criminals giving a wrong explanation, or the other officers giving wrong assessments, etc., because those are too generic, whereas Columbo's own eccentricites are what define his character and the show.
posted by amyms at 5:32 PM on August 21, 2010

You have to refine it, as you play it.

Friends of mine and I once invented a drinking game for the original Ocean's 11 (well before the remake was a glimmer in Soderberg's eye, thankyouverymuch). Without sharing all the details, the basis of the game was you drank when they drank; you drank when they smoked. But people were getting far too tipsy far too early. We had to change it so that you only drank when they lit up a cigarette, rather than every time they took a puff. And we had to pare out some peripheral stuff.

The lesson from this story: you may have a great-sounding game on paper. But you won't have it right until a few iterations. During those iterations, have fun but be safe too.
posted by .kobayashi. at 6:28 PM on August 21, 2010

drink every time he asks to borrow a pencil or the phone.
posted by kch at 7:54 PM on August 21, 2010

yeah, you should check out The Thin Man drinking game.
posted by ovvl at 8:41 PM on August 21, 2010

Drink every time Columbo searches through the pockets in his trenchcoat and suit looking for something. Could be a pen, a piece of evidence, or similar.
posted by mattybonez at 9:16 PM on August 21, 2010

Every time he mentions the wife I'd make your friends stand and say "a toast to the missus."
posted by furtive at 11:00 PM on August 21, 2010 [1 favorite]

You could split it into 'teams' and have Team Columbo and Team Criminal. Make each side responsible for making sure the other drinks. Have each side only have 5 drinking rules, but then have 3-4 common rules that affect everybody.
posted by robocop is bleeding at 6:13 AM on August 22, 2010