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querying the hive mind
August 21, 2010
Can you recommend a self-help book for dealing with friendship breakup/betrayal issues? I have found some books for dealing with marital infidelity, which I am not concerned with.
(4 answers total)
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In Sheep's Clothing: Understanding and Dealing with Manipulative People
by George K. Simon, has helped me in the past.
on August 21, 2010
I'm not sure if all the stories in here will help, but there's also
The Friend Who Got Away: Twenty Women's True Life Tales of Friendships that Blew Up, Burned Out or Faded Away
on August 22, 2010
i'm not sure if i'm different than most in this area but i feel that very similiar if not exactly the same issues arise in romantic relationship and in friendships. for me this is true so I approach them similarly. i have yet to drag a friend into therapy but have always said that it would be good. i think issues are issues and they can come up in any relationship that has the 'right' chemistry. with that said, i would treat it like any other issue: i would have a chat with my friend about the betrayl, explain my feelings & perspective, and see if someting could be done differently the next time this comes up (should it come up).
on August 23, 2010
Secrets & Confidences
was published at the same time as
The Friend Who Got Away,
linked upthread, and it deals with a lot of the same material; but as the titles suggest, the overwhelming focus of both books is on women's friendships. Not sure if that helps.
The book that really helped me get through a catastrophic friendship-breakup was Fred Luskin's
Forgive For Good.
There was no possibility of dragging-erstwhile-friend-into-therapy because all conversation had ceased. So I had to forgive myself for whatever I'd done to deserve rejection, and I had to forgive my friend for rejecting me. It took years and was beyond painful, and if you are asking on your own behalf, you have my sympathy.
on August 23, 2010
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