Like ironing to flatten out the wrinkles in my life

August 15, 2010 6:33 AM

I'm a bit disorganised and sometimes a bit depressed, and I think I want to advertise for someone to come over once a week and spend maybe two hours helping me to do all of the practical things I need to do - paying bills, applying for courses I want to do, and the like. Is this the worst idea ever?

I've just probably missed the boat on applying for an MA programme because I procrastinated about it for such a long time. I asked friends to help and they said they would, but they've been too busy, and I think it may have been a bit too much to ask in the first place. I've also just completed a course of CBT and found myself wishing it had focused more on the practical side of things, and less on the ho-hum how-do-we-feel part. Is there any reason why I couldn't get someone, in the way people get a cleaner, to sit with me while I fill forms and suchlike? What might go wrong with this? Are there better and worse ways I could do it?

posted by Acheman to Work & Money (15 answers total)

This is a great idea- I know a few people who hire part-time personal assistants to do this sort of thing; my wife has a home organizing business, which also often bleeds over into this area.

Be aware that you'll need to divide up the work into items that you can and can't delegate- but the act of doing this will also help you get organized.

Good luck!
posted by jenkinsEar at 6:38 AM on August 15, 2010

It's an excellent idea. You're sharing your money by providing employment, and getting practical household help at the same time. If you lived near me, I would be first in line, provided I could choose my own hours. I would charge $30 per hour.
posted by BostonTerrier at 6:41 AM on August 15, 2010 [1 favorite]

God no that's not a bad idea. It's a brilliant idea. I was just sayin to my SO yesterday that I wished I had a personal assistant - someone who I could tell to make my eye doc appointments, order the sofa I want and arrange for he old one to go away, make sure my insurance gets paid.
Make sure they set up a ysyem that streamlines the whole process- online billpay with all he bills geting emaied to the same account, etc.
Good luck and tell us how it goes!
posted by 8dot3 at 6:48 AM on August 15, 2010

Personal assistants provide a valuable service, provided you've got more money than time/motivation/organizational skill. You can probably get them to actually do these things for you rather than babysit you while you do it.

I would go with a professional outfit though. You're going to be exposing rather intimate and significant details of your life, and you should want some assurances that the person you're hiring is associated with a reputable establishment which maintains insurance. This seems like one.
posted by valkyryn at 6:49 AM on August 15, 2010 [4 favorites]

I think it's a terrific idea in part because it will help you help yourself. Getting ready for the visits and thinking up new tasks for the helper that improve your life... or deciding to do some of them yourself instead will improve your competency in the areas you're trying to address. By analogy, if you've ever experienced life when you have a regularly scheduled cleaning service, you know that you tidy up before the housekeeper comes; clearing clutter to make deep cleaning easier so that you get the most out of each visit. (The trick, in that case, is to avoid things worse long term by just stowing stuff randomly to get it out of sight.)
posted by carmicha at 6:50 AM on August 15, 2010

I agree it's a fantastic idea. Disagreeing politely with valkyryn, I'd suggest that some of the benefit here for you would probably be in strengthening your own self-discipline, so even you could afford just to delegate all this stuff to someone else, the idea of having someone to sit with you might be preferable.

If you feel able to mention this to a few friends or family, I think this is a classic case where the ideal candidate will come from a recommendation, and possibly it won't be someone who does this standardly as their full-time job. This would be a great role for a certain kind of graduate student looking to earn a bit of extra cash, or a retired person with a lifetime's experience of being an office administrator, say.
posted by game warden to the events rhino at 6:56 AM on August 15, 2010

You could even kick it up a notch and hire a life coach.
posted by watercarrier at 6:59 AM on August 15, 2010 [1 favorite]

I think it would be more useful to first hire some one to assess whether you have: the capacity to do these things and simply lack the skill set; or perhaps have a relatively permanent skill deficit. Then you can either hire some one to help you develop the skills and provide interim practical support or hire some one who will do it on an ongoing basis while you focus on other priorities. Just as in life--there are things I simply can not do, things I do not want to do and things I want to learn to do. All in all though, I do think it is preferable to be self sufficient in those things that make daily living manageable and rewarding.
posted by rmhsinc at 7:43 AM on August 15, 2010

(Re: "worst idea ever" -- is that what your self-talk usually sounds like when you have an idea? Because that there may be a big part of the reason why you are feeling stuck.) No, it's an excellent idea! There is nothing wrong with needing and getting help. I met with someone once a week to help me set goals and stay on top of my to-do list, and it was a HUGE help, and sparked a period of transformation and improvement in my life that continues to this day.
posted by ottereroticist at 8:21 AM on August 15, 2010 [4 favorites]

Great idea, just don't rely on this person for therapy, or advice about life, or emotional support. See a therapist about those things.
posted by Napoleonic Terrier at 8:56 AM on August 15, 2010

I think it's a great idea! My husband and I have considered doing that for him because he has problems with organization. One of the main things that got my husband through his applications to grad school was that he told me the schools he was interested in, and then I did some of the grunt work like looking up their requirements, getting the required forms, filling out the basic info (name, address, prior schooling), and I kept him on task with the components of the applications that he needed to do (personal statement, updating resume).

I think having a personal assistant with some of the mundane things can be helpful if some of your tasks occur on a regular schedule throughout the month. Paying the same bills every month at the same time of the month can easily be tackled by an assistant.

I worked as a part-time personal assistant in high school, and part of what helped me do a good job was that my boss kept a running, prioritized To Do list. One reason we haven't hired an assistant for my husband is that he has trouble keeping a To Do list. If most of what you need done are immediate or repeating tasks, things that are either on your mind a lot or are easily predictable, you might be fine if you otherwise have issues with lists. But if what you want an assistant to do is things you think you should do but have trouble getting to or prioritizing, it might require some additional work on your part to maintain a list and to know exactly what you want out of those tasks so you can explain them to someone else.
posted by Terriniski at 9:10 AM on August 15, 2010

I worked for many years as a personal assistant, and for some of my bosses this is exactly what I did. You just need to establish a routine -- like, get a basket, and throw all of your bills into it. And the course catalog, or a To Do list. Throw it all in there, and so the assistant knows that when he/she arrives, the first thing you do together is go through that basket, prioritize what needs to be done that day, and get going.
posted by BlahLaLa at 9:20 AM on August 15, 2010

It's a great idea! There's nothing wrong with asking for some practical help with getting through day-to-day life maintenance. I helped people with this all the time when I was a personal assistant. If I'm cleaning out a closet or plowing through bills or something, it helps to have someone there to keep me on track and not spend two hours reading old letters (or whatever). A friend refers to this as "being someone's stable pony," in that he's helping someone get from Point A to Point B with a minimum number of freakouts, the way a stable pony helps a racehorse.

Choose someone who won't make you feel like crap about being a bit disorganized: you don't need someone coming in and judging you, especially if organization comes easily to them. It also helps if they have the ability to stay on task and not chat entertainingly with you the whole time.

Fantastic idea, really. I may consider hiring someone myself!
posted by corey flood at 10:46 AM on August 15, 2010

It's a good idea, but as mentioned above, you want to find someone to do this who isn't likely to steal your identity, either because they're professionally affiliated in some way or because they're a good friend. Paying bills and applying to colleges are both activities in which your most confidential information is involved—financial account numbers, your Social Security number, your date of birth, etc.—and you need to be sure that information will be secure.
posted by limeonaire at 1:18 PM on August 15, 2010

I'd hire a professional organizer rather than an assistant. The organizer can help you set up a system that you can live with. Even if you do have an assistant once a month or so, you'll save time and money, because you have the system in place.

And professional organizers are usually bonded.
posted by Ideefixe at 5:54 PM on August 15, 2010 [1 favorite]